Saturday, April 16, 2005

If everybody was in shape, then who would we laugh at?

Finally, Draft Day is here!!!

What do you mean the draft isn't until next week? No. You're wrong on this one buddy. I'm watching the selections in the WNBA Draft right now.

Ohhh, the draft that everybody has been talking about is the NFL Draft? It all makes alot more sense to me now. Though I must say that I can't really understand why there isn't more made about the WNBA Draft. I mean, c'mon the WNBA is at least the seventh most popular professional sports league in America.

Actually, scratch that, I've just received word that Midget Billiards has moved into the number seven position. It was a good run while it lasted there WNBA.

The celebrity softball game was mediocre at best last night with both Herschel Walker and George "the Animal" Steele registering no-shows. Oh well. The highlights were few and far between but there was still enough going on to keep me mildly entertained.

-Former American Gladiator "Tank" was in attendance and brought along an illegal bat that he was telling everybody on his team to use. Just to review: Tank brought an illegal bat...to a charity softball game.

-Former Road Ruler Ibis looked as if she had never even seen a sporting event, much less participated in one. I've seen tee ball players with a better grip on the rules of the game than she had. In a completely unrelated note: She is absolutely beautiful...but could certainly use some one-on one time with a treadmill and a few less trips to Friendly's.

-The years (and more than a few plastic surgeons, I'm sure) have been very kind to Sheila E. I'd definitely call her a DILF...a drummer I'd like to fuck. What the hell did you think I was talking about?

-Former big league journeyman/pitcher Dennis Rasmussen is huge. I mean enormous. I'd have guessed offensive tackle or tight end if I'd been forced to guess a sport and position. The man is the size of a Grizzly Bear.

-Highlight of the night: Watching Eric Nies try to use the dugout fence to get himself up to the stands in order to sign autographs for his adoring fans ( more than likely some distant cousins). When the former host of "The Grind" pushed off the dugout fence with his feet, it gave way and caused Nies to fall (flat on his back) to the dugout floor some five feet below. Hilarious. The only possible way it could've been any better would've been if he'd banged his head on the dugout steps during the fall.

Further proof that ESPN is run by a bunch of monkeys who have no business running a network based on sports: On ESPN.com today, there is a poll asking fans to vote on the biggest bust in NFL Draft history with choices such as Tony Mandarich and Ryan Leaf. Another name on the list is former Tennessee Volunteer Heath Shuler. It's just too bad that the good folks in Bristol spelled his name Heath Schuler. Way to go guys. I wonder why Blare Thomas wasn't on the list?

I may be really late with this link as it is apparently the most downloaded clip on the internet but I just saw it yesterdy and I wouldn't be able to look at myself in the mirror if I didn't it share it with you. http://www.ebaumsworld.com/numanuma.html Enjoy your weekend.

1 comment:

T.J. said...

Anytime Eric Nies is mentioned it is funny. Plus you threw in the Miz. Golden.