Do you want to know what I'm going to be watching tonight? Of course you don't, but you're going to get it anyway. It's an easy decision this evening: Boise State-Bowling Green. Even though both of these teams aren't as good as they were predicted to be by all the "experts" that seem to fill up every hour of afternoon TV these days. I'm still eagerly anticipating watching this game for two reasons. (1) It's a football game on a Wednesday night. I would even watch Army-Navy if it were on a wednesday night, and I've steadfastly refused to watch that game ever since I was old enough to have the guts to steal the remote from my father's hands. (2) These two team should combine to score more points than 75% of the of the college basketball games that will air on ESPN this year. This game should do as much for fans of prolific and inventive college offenses as the old Nebraska-Oklahoma matchups did for fans of the wishbone. I can't wait. If I have to pick a winner I'd go with Bowling Green. Why? Because they won't be blown off the ball by Boise like they were against Wisconsin, I love Omar Jacobs and I know a couple of kids who went to Bowling Green. Who the hell has ever met anybody who ever went to Boise State?
When I said "remote" earlier, I meant chopstick. Let me explain. My family was not what you would call affluent in my younger years and we had an old Zenith TV with buttons (1-13) that you pushed to select your channel. As time wore on these buttons fell backwards into the TV. I know it sounds ridiculous but its true. Our solution was to use a chopstick to reach into the hole where the buttons once resided and push the button with said chopstick. Sadly, that wasn't even the most ghetto item that was in our living room at the time. I'll spare you the details but you should be able to guess that is was quite embarrassing. Of course not as embarrassing as the Xmas when I asked for Chuck Taylors and got a pair of Pro Wings. I opended them in horror to hear my father utter the immortal words, "Those are just as good, probably better."
And I actually miss my childhood.