Chiefs @ Colts: A lot of people are looking at Indy’s porous run defense and Larry Johnson (Its just like you white people to stare at a black man) and quickly calling this the upset of the weekend. I, however, am not one of these people. Say what you will about Peyton Manning (seriously, say whatever you want...gay) but he’s yet to lose this early in the playoffs and I have a hard time believing that this KC team will be the one to make it happen. While Johnson should have a field day with Indy’s D, I can’t see KC’s D keeping the Colts offense down long enough to allow Johnson to pound the ball at them for 4 quarters. A lot of things have changed in the NFL this year but here’s something that hasn’t: The Chiefs defense, especially their secondary, still sucks. The fast track in Indy plays to the strength of the Colts on both sides of the ball and KC doesn’t have enough playmakers on either side of the ball to make this dream upset a reality. I’ll take the Colts by a couple of TDs. COLTS
Cowboys @ Seahawks: Apparently it rains all the damn time in Seattle during the winter. I have this on good authority. I’ve also heard that the fans in Seattle get abnormally loud for NFL fans. The combination of wet conditions and people yelling mean things at high volumes doesn’t sound like a good combination of factors for Droppsy McSensitive, or, as he’s known to some, Terrell Owens. Neither Dallas or Seattle have inspired much confidence with their recent play so I’m going with the home team that has a playoff experienced QB. Seriously that’s it. Wait, I do have one request. Could we find the dude who bashed Ken Hamlin’s head in and get him a Cowboys locker room pass? I’ve got a few guys who I’d like him to meet. SEAHAWKS
Jets @ Patriots: Did you know that Eric Mangini used to work for Bill Belichick? Really, he did. Somewhat recently too, if I’m not mistaken. I figured I’d let you in on this nugget since you’re unlikely to hear about it at any point this weekend. Its uncanny how stories like this always seem to slip under the collective radar of sports media. Luckily for you, I’ve got my ear to the pulse of the sports worlds brain waves. That’s right, just go ahead and try to screw up a metaphor as badly as I just did. I guess I should say something about this game at some point, so here goes: Boston vs. NY, except its really Foxboro vs. New Jersey…feel the hatred. Oh yeah!! You know what? I’m so fucking bored with the Patriots. Lets just go with the fat kid. JETS
Giants @ Eagles: Do you think we could fly the Hamlin Basher across country for this game? If so, I have a full days worth of work for him within the Giants locker room. What a bunch of annoying, overhyped douchebags on this team. I’m not sure what to think of this game. I mean, with the way the regular season concluded it should be a win for the suddenly hot (or bi-curious)Eagles. However, the Giants are the more talented team (on paper) and the Eagles seem ripe for a fall. I’m going to bet against the gay QB and go with the one afflicted with Downs Syndrome. Risky, I know but, hey, that’s why they call it gambling. ( Honestly, I have no clue about this game. None whatsoever.) GIANTS
Finally, if you’re so hard up for football that you need a fix early Saturday afternoon, tune in to NBC where the Army High School All-American game is being broadcast from San Antonio. It’s a glorified practice that also serves as a press conference for a couple dozen kids who announce their collegiate choices while the game is in progress. Florida has four commits playing tomorrow as well as a number of other prospects who list the Gators as favorites. It should be interesting to see what (if any) additional commits that Gators (among others) receive tomorrow.
Hopefully, I’ll have enough time over the weekend to write a post on Monday’s National Championship Game/3.5 hour heart attack in Glendale. If all goes well (read: I don’t spend the entire weekend drinking/drunk) then I’ll have it up and ready for perusal sometime Monday morning. Enjoy the weekend and, more importantly, enjoy the football…we only have so much left.