Apparently they expect me to work all day during the year of 2005...if I'd have known that this was part of the deal then maybe I wouldn't have had the ER staff pump my stomach on New Year's Eve. As a result of the unreasonable demands on my time that my boss is making, I will once again be unable to give you much today...other than of course the two funniest things that I have seen/heard in months. Seriously, if everything in life made brought me as much unbridled joy as much as the following two items, I probably wouldn't have to preemptively place my name on the list seeking liver donors. Anyway...

The Orlando Magic snapped a 4 game losing streak last night which included losses to such powerhouses as the Bulls, Bucks, and Knicks. Somehow, Steve Francis was unable to comprehend why the media has been criticizing the Magic for losing to these NBDL teams. When asked how he felt about getting a big win over the Seattle Sonics, Francis replied that it felt good because, "We been hearing that we're the worst team since sliced bread." Evidently, I have been working way to hard lately because I didn't even realize that sliced bread was a team. What city do they play in? Who's they're leading scorer? As bad as they (apparently) are, have they considered firing their head coach? I couldn't be more full of questions right now.

This doesn't even need an explanation, just click on the link...all I can say is that I am ready to officially bury the hatchet with Clinton Portis for not attending the University of Florida. How can I be mad at him after this... http://www.czabe.com/audioclips/easterns_video.avi.wmv