Happy Thanksgiving...let's get drunk!

It's that time of the year again. No, not the time to break out your Perfect Strangers DVDs. Though that does sounds fun. No, not the time to appreciate all the blessings in your life and spend time with family. While that's nice and all, there's nothing that says you can't do that at in the middle of April.

I'm talking about the annual Thanksgiving weekend that also doubles as an excuse to get rip-roaring drunk for four or five consecutive nights. What's better than getting shitcanned, sleeping in/laying on the couch all morning and then gorging yourself on some of the most delicious, artery clogging food this side of Milwaukee? Not much. Except, maybe getting repeatedly shitcanned, sleeping in and devouring boatloads of leftover artery clogging food. That's my Thanksgiving wish for all of you out there today. Booze, food and football. I'm pretty sure, you won't get a more thoughtful gift all year long. Enjoy.

On a personal note, I won't be eating Thanksgiving with my family for the first time since my freshman year in college. While the lucky people who get to be related to me (Seriously, how envious are you?) are all in Tallahassee this weekend, I'll be back here with my girlfriend and her family for the holiday. That's right, not only am I missing Thanksgiving, I'll also be missing out on free tickets to the Florida-FSU football game. I guess I could drive up on Friday for the game but there's something else at work here besides me being the greatest boyfriend ever.

You see, I've never seen the Gators win at Doak Campbell. Never. Ever. I saw them tie once (ugh) but that's as close as I've come. When Florida broke the 18 year winless streak in Doak two years ago, I was working an event. So, I've decided, in the best interest of Florida football, to stay home and watch this game on TV. Lest I show up and cause the Mighty Gators to lose and ruin the faint National Championship hopes that they still have. While I'll miss the atmosphere of this rivalry. I won't miss the drive to Tallahassee, the smell of Tallahassee and the dim-witted residents of Tallahassee. Hopefully, my strategy works.

Finally, tomorrow is the annual Turkey Bowl game. This is a pretty big deal between my friends and I and always provides plenty of high (and low) lights for all. What else can you say about an event in which at least 50% of the participants are still drunk from the night before?

Disclaimer: This post sucks. I know that. Blame the half day that I'm taking today and the generous helping of Maker's Mark I drank last night for that. Or blame me. I don't care. I've got the next five days off. I've also got the following things on my agenda during that time: Get drunk, play football, watch football, eat, get drunk, watch basketball, eat, get drunk, watch Florida-Kansas (basketball), eat, watch Florida-FSU (football), get drunk, eat, get drunk(er), eat, watch more football. Happy Thanksgiving indeed.

Rambling, rambling, rambling...

Unlike every other sports-related blogger or journalist or pseudo-journalist today, I’m not going to discuss the Michigan-Ohio State game until your ears (or eyes, I guess) bleed. Maybe I’m the only one, but it’s starting to feel like this game can’t possibly live up to the hype that’s preceded it. I certainly hope it does, I mean I am planning my entire Saturday around it, but when people have been discussing every minute detail of a regular season game for over a week’s time it just starts to feel like we’re all being set up for a tremendous disappointment.

Anyway, because I’m not going to discuss tomorrow’s Game of the Century (alright I’m going to talk about it a little bit at the end of this post) I figured I would try and get to a number of topics that I’ve been thinking about as of late. It’s been quite some time since I sat down and collected my random thoughts in this space and there’s no time like the present right? Right?

- Since I haven’t done this in a while, lets start with something easy. Well, I guess its really not easy for anybody other than Josh Smith to do something like this. Well, Josh Smith and Jesus, maybe.

- By now most of you know that Michael Redd scored 57 points last weekend. Redd’s performance was one of the top 5 highest scoring games in NBA history. Now, do you know who he replaced at #5? Purvis Short…yeah I had no idea either. I mean, I know who Purvis Short is but suffice it to say I had no idea he had EVER dropped 50 in an NBA game. Shit, he wasn’t even the most famous Purvis around when he dropped 50+ for Golden State in 84/85.

The ONLY guy who makes Danny Ferry feel good about his NBA career.

- More randomness: Check out the name for Kobe Bryant’s old shoe from Adidas. Wow. I guess you can’t name a shoe the Alleged Rapist.

- By now, most of you have heard that Gerald Levert died last week. What I’m wondering is how his son, Khalid El-Amin, has been dealing with the loss.

It's so sad when children outlive their parents.

- I heard a lot of people bash the Spurs for not adequately replacing Nazr Mohammed and Rasho Nesterovic this summer. My first thought was, “We’re talking about the same two guys who couldn’t get off the bench in last year’s playoffs right.” After that, I began to think about the guys whom they did replace those two with and how I thought they might actually fit in better with San Antonio. The thing is, all the Spurs need out of their center spot is 6 fouls, hustle and a rudimentary concept of the proper rotations on both offense and defense within their system. Duncan is so good that he’ll draw enough double teams to allow a smart big man to get easy points through putbacks and cutting layups. Now look at who the Spurs brought in. Fabricio Oberto (ok, he was their last year but he never played) and Francisco Elson. Neither of them have much offensive game but they are both far more active and athletic than either of their predecessors. Furthermore, Oberto already understands so many of the little aspects of team basketball through his experience with the Argentinian national team that he actually makes the Spurs better defensively when he’s on the floor. To sum up, the Spurs spent less money this summer AND got better and more athletic. That, is why they are the best organization in basketball. I still can’t stand to watch them play for long stretches of time though.

- I’m a little biased here, but David Lee’s developing into a beast of a power forward. Exactly the kind of guy who could lead the league in rebounding a few years from now in an uptempo system. Don’t believe me, just look at his stats so far this year: 9 rebs in 23.4 minutes per game. Even I have to admit to being a little surprised by his level of productivity.

- I'm not really sure how this has slipped under the national radar, but it's come to my attention that Alabama big man Jemareo Davidson has taken a leave of absence from the basketball team after his girlfriend was killed in a car crash last week. Apparently, Davidson was sitting in the passenger seat of her car during the accident. Jesus, that sounds awful. I'm hoping to see him back on the court soon. (Note: I didn't mean to go all Peter King there but that's just a horrible thing for anybody to have to experience)

- Al Harrington has always been spectacularly ugly. I would even say cartoonish in his defining characterstics. However, now that he is rocking that mohawk, he looks positively ridiculous. I’m guessing thats why he torched the Magic last Friday night. It is awfully tough to play defense when you’re bent over laughing.

- As we all know, the NBA is a copycat league. So it comes as no surprise that a number of NBA teams are trying to replicate the Suns’ recent success by converting to uptempo offensive systems. In theory, this sounds great. Players love to run, the rules are currently set up for this style of play and any approach that allows teams to score more easily is always going to be welcomed by coaches. However, the system that the Suns employ is predicated on some specific parts that not many teams have. I watched a number of teams who have taken on this new, fast-paced approach and I have to say that the results (at least in the early going) are less than inspiring. I’m going to tackle three of these teams and point out why they are not cut out for this approach to offense.

Indiana: The first problem is Rick Carlisle. While he’s a fine NBA coach, he’s also the kind of guy who draws up plays during intramurals. The fast-paced approach needs a coach who’s willing to be hands off and let his players play fairly undisturbed. Rick Carlisle cannot do this. In fact, I’m pretty sure he wakes up at night in cold sweats thinking about Jamaal Tinsley directing his ball club unfettered. Beyond Carlisle, this system also needs a number of quality outside shooters who can spread the floor and open driving lanes. Indiana is woefully inadequate in this department. Name one consistent shooter on the Pacers. It’s okay, I have plenty of time. Jasikevicius qualifies but he can’t play more than 20 minutes a game, so who else does that leave the Pacers with? Stephen Jackson? I think you get my point.

Denver: Do you know why the Suns offense is so damn productive? Because Steve Nash is running it. Say what you will about Nash (no defense, stats inflated by the system, stupid hippie) but it’s tough to deny that he’s the perfect fit for the Suns’ system. Fast break teams thrive off of the play of their point guards. More specifically, players will run until their shoes fall off if they believe that their point guard will find them for easy layups and wide open jumpers. That’s Denver’s biggest problem. Their point guards are not suited to their system. Andre Miller is an average PG at best. He doesn’t have the jumpshot to keep defenses honest (and thereby open up driving lanes) and he’s a chronic over dribbler. Nothing can kill a fast break quite like a PG who doesn’t give up the ball at the right time. Miller may be averaging 9.5 assists/gm right now but all you need to do is watch him once to understand what I mean. He doesn't "find" people as much as he gets bailed out on his wild forays to the hoop.

Backup PG Earl Boykins is even more ill-suited to this offense. He is and always will be a shoot first PG. It’s not entirely his fault. He never would’ve made the NBA if he wasn’t such a prolific scorer. However, that doesn’t change the fact he just doesn’t work with what Denver’s trying to do. Additionally, Denver actually has less outside shooting than Indiana. Other than Carmelo (and Earl when he’s hot) they don’t have a single player on that team whom opposing teams fear as an outside shooter. For example, on Tuesday night in Orlando the Nuggets had this lineup on the floor for almost half the second quarter: Miller, Linas Kleiza, Carmelo, Reggie Evans and Marcus Camby. Can anybody say zone?

Washington: Here’s a team I think could actually be successful running this system. While Arenas is a shoot–first PG of the highest order, he does involve his teammates in the open floor. More importantly, the rest of the Wizards lineup is well suited to this style of play. Guys like Jamison, Daniels, Butler and Stevenson (even Thomas) all benefit from playing a more wide open style which accentuates their strengths (athleticism, speed) while also speeding up the tempo of play and covering up for some of their defensive deficiencies. While they lack an ideal number of outside shooters for the system, they probably have enough to keep defenses honest on the break. So what’s the problem? Well, Eddie Jordan publicly admitted that he had no idea how to run such a system. I guess that takes care of that then.

- Speaking of the Wizards, I commented earlier this year that I didn’t understand why DeShawn Stevenson would sign with the Wiz, basically saying that he didn’t fit in and would (likely) end up nailed to the bench. It seems as though I was wrong. Shocking, I know. He has not only been a starter since day 1 in DC, he also seems to have supplied the Wiz with some much needed defensive intensity. Furthermore, his willingness to get his offense without having plays called for him has allowed Washington to feed the ball to their primary offensive options without worrying about keeping him happy. While Stevenson is far from a perfect player, his toughness and unselfishness make him a very positive addition to the Wizards.

With that said, and I never though I’d say this, the Magic miss him this year. The Magic don’t have many natural “2s” on their team. Other than Bogans, all the other swingmen (Hill, Turkoglu, Ariza) are more natural “3s”. This has lead to some problems in matching up with some of the leagues better wing scorers. You don’t want Hill guarding the team’s best scorer for 35 minutes a night and at 6’10” Hedo is not athletic enough to keep up with most of these guys on the perimeter. As for Ariza, while he’s promising there’s absolutely no way he should be on the court for more than 10-15 minutes a night at this point in his career. Beyond the defense that he brought, Stevenson was also a primary facilitator of the Magic’s offense. He often ran the point in the halfcourt, which allowed Nelson/Arroyo to come off baseline screens for jumpshots and he was the Magic’s primary post feeder. While they are currently 6-3, the Magic also lead the NBA in turnovers (by a wide margin) and the absence of Stevenson is a primary reason for this. Its really too bad that Stevenson didn’t realize his agent was a total douchebag until it was too late, for both parties

- Finally, I wanted to give my two cents on the NBA’s recent attempts to clean up their image. I think we can all agree that the post-foul whining had gotten out of control in recent years and I have no problem with Stern and Co. trying to change the overall culture. However, the new rule has placed far too much power in the hands of the refs and thus has created a double standard among players. I’ve seen Tim Duncan throw his hands up in the air, walk away from a ref and then (with his back turned while walking upcourt) drop the ball as he was near midcourt. Do you know what happened? Nothing. Not a peep from any of the refs. If somebody like Stephon Marbury (Sheed was too easy) does this iis almost assuredly a technical, and possibly worse.

That’s only one example, there are plenty of more. Basketball is a sport. Sports are emotional and players will react when they feel as though they’ve been wronged. That is a natural part of sports. If you are going to punish players for minor offenses and gestures, it must be universal. Of course, we know this is impossible when human emotions are involved. So why not scale it back a touch? I’ve heard the argument that Michael and Larry and Russell, etc. were all emotional and they didn’t have this problem. That’s right, because they were given some rope by officials who weren’t both semi-incompetent and completely untouchable by any and all players and coaches. Do you know what else Larry, Michael and Russell did an awful lot of during their time in the league? Talked trash and got into fights. So does that mean we should bring all of that back to the NBA? Personally, I say the NBA could use a little more in-game vitriol these days as it’s becoming pretty antiseptic, but I think you get my point.

- What’s even worse than the “no whining” rule? This article in the New Daily News. I was already going to write about this based on Jermaine O’Neal’s recent fine for “wearing his wristband too high on his arm”. I realize that their has to be some regulation of uniforms in the NBA, but this is getting completely ludicrous. Me thinks David Stern needs to come down out of his ivory tower for a little while before he has a bigger (more racially driven) problem on his hands.

- Alright, now onto that game that everyone in the Western Hemisphere is so intrigued by( or so it seems). Here’s my extremely quick take:

Michigan’s D, (especially the front four) will give the Ohio State offense fits with the pressure they’re able to create. They won’t shutdown OSU but they will force a turnover or two. While I don’t believe in Chad Henne (never have, never will), I do believe that the Buckeye secondary is overrated, semi-untested and ripe for exposure. If Manningham is healthy ( I think so) they will have to play a lot of zone to avoid too many one-on-one matchups between OSU’s corners (the #1 is a former walk-on) and Michigan’s receivers. I think the Wolverines make enough big plays in the passing game and take advantage of a TO in OSU territory to win.

Score:

Michigan 26
OSU 17

Enjoy this...I always do. Oh, and have a good weekend.

How to Save a Season...

I’m not sure if you heard, but the University of Florida participated in a pretty closely contested football game this past Saturday afternoon. I was prepared for a close game, chock full of could’ve and should’ve beens on both sides of the ball going into this game. I was not, however, prepared for a game that would take approximately five years off of my increasingly short lifespan. Because I’m incapable of discussing Florida Football concisely without parameters under which to work, I’m going to break down my thoughts on Saturday’s win into various topics of note (Note: this is not meant to mean that this post will be concise. Far from it, in fact):

Frustration: This is, without a doubt, the most frustrating 9-1 team in the history of 9-1 teams. Most of my frustration with this team stems from the offense, or more specifically, the offense’s inability to establish any consistent rhythm. There is more talent at the skill positions on this offense than any Gator team since 2001. I would even submit that this team, while not as dynamic at the top of the depth chart as say 2001 or 1996, boasts even more depth at the skill positions than just about any Gator team in the past 20 years. This depth seems to be one of the problems. While this may seem strange, it’s struck me over the past couple of weeks that some of the problem with Florida’s offense is the constant attempt to involve all of Florida’s playmakers as opposed to sticking with the “hot hand”. Instead of punishing defenses with a steady diet of what’s working, Offensive Coordinator Dan Mullen too often tries to keep defenses off balance by changing up what is working. By doing this, Mullen allows defenses to regain momentum while also throwing his “hot” playmakers out of their rhythm. Evidence of this can be seen in the stats of DeShawn Wynn against USC. Despite averaging over 7 yards a carry, Wynn was limited to 13 carries for the game. While I’m not saying that Florida should abandon their passing game, it certainly wouldn’t have hurt Florida to call Wynn’s number a few more times on Saturday. Especially in the red zone, where he was completely ignored by Mullen on, not one, but two scoreless trips during Saturday’s game.

Chris Leak: I’m not one of the Florida fans who’ve been calling for Tim Tebow to play more. In fact, I think that the Florida coaching staff has done a great job of putting Tebow into situations that are geared for success. While nobody is denying Tebow’s talent, it should be stated that he is a true freshman with a rudimentary understanding of the passing game. To put him into too many varied situations would not only run the risk of damaging his confidence but also, possibly, result in a season changing turnover (see Shockley, DJ: 2002). For further proof of this, one need only look at Tebow's two passing attempts against USC. On both occasions, Tebow had a receiver open (Dallas Baker & Tate Casey) but focused only on his primary receiver. Thankfully, the result was a couple of incompletions. Things could’ve turned out much worse, especially on Tebow’s first attempt where he tried to squeeze a pass into double coverage in the endzone.

With all of this being said, Chris Leak’s inaccuracy as a passer continues to be his Achilles heel. Simply put, he too often forces his receivers to “make a play” when an accurately thrown ball would result in huge gains. He needed an unbelievable effort from Dallas Baker on his TD pass to avoid a disastrous turnover late in the first half. Beyond that, he badly missed on a couple of other passes that surely would’ve resulted in large gains for the Florida offense. Leak deserves credit for his gutsy running and play calling on the final drive (he checked into both of his draws on the final drive) and he did look more in control of the offense than he has in weeks but he’s still far behind what should be expected of a senior QB who has been starting since the 4th game of his freshman year. In an effort to curb some of these mistakes, I would suggest that Meyer and Mullen employ more basic routes such as shallow crosses and outs. Use of these routes have two positive offshoots, they allow some of Florida’s "playmakers” (Harvin, Ingram, Caldwell) to operate in space while also not forcing Leak to make a perfect throw into tight coverage. The use of these, and other, shorter more basic routes should be viewed as one of the primary reasons that Leak finished Saturday’s game 23-29.

“Cute” playcalling: This was an especially frustrating aspect of Saturday’s game. Nearly every time the Florida had the ball (Only 7 offensive possessions…this clock rule SUCKS!) the offense marched down the field with relative ease only to stall once within South Carolina’s 30 yard line. The main culprit for much of this wasn’t penalties or dropped passes as has so often been the case this year. Rather, it was the playcalling of Dan Mullen. On Florida’s first drive, after moving to the USC 4 yard line, Mullen called for a shovel pass despite the Gamecock’s complete inability to stop the ball being run directly at them. The result? A seven yard loss. This put Florida in a clear passing situation on second and third down and eventually ended in a missed FG by Chris Hetland. More notably, during the fourth quarter, Mullen called a reverse throwback pass at the South Carolina 13 yard line for Andre Caldwell that ultimately resulted in a 16 yard loss. This loss would eventually lead to Florida coming up short on 3rd and 2 and having to settle for a FG. Mullen called a very good game on Saturday, involving many players and keeping USC off balance. However, he nearly cost the Gators the football game by trying to trick his way into the endzone instead of simply lining up with superior talent and forcing Carolina to stop the Florida offense. While this sort of thing may have been somewhat necessary at Mullen’s previous stops, he must realize that, in most cases, his team has a talent advantage and he doesn’t need gimmicks to get 6.

Defense: The Florida defense is officially vulnerable. The loss of Marcus Thomas has been covered here. However, it bears noting that the Gators have given up over five yards a carry since Thomas was booted off the team. This shouldn’t be all that surprising when you consider that Florida is now starting three DEs on their D-Line. Additionally, Florida’s pass rush has suffered without Thomas’ push up the middle. Not only did Florida fail to record a sack for the first time all season on Saturday, they weren’t ever really that close. The loss of a consistent pass rush combined with an inability to stop the run (Siler’s injury could continue to be a BIG factor here) further exposes a thin Florida secondary that has had it’s hands full on numerous occasions this year. While no secondary can survive without an adequate pass rush, Florida’s secondary is absolutely cooked if front seven can’t find a way to put pressure on opposing passer and at least provide a mild resistance to runs up the gut.

Wow, that was awfully negative wasn’t it? It sure was, but what do you expect after a game that was so thoroughly given away by the home team? I can promise you that it would’ve been a whole hell of a lot worse if not for the fantastic hands on one Jarvis Moss. In an effort to at least appear positive, I’d like to specifically site the performances of the following people:

Jarvis Moss: Another in a long line of Jarvis’ at Florida, and now, perhaps the most famous of them all. Moss’s block(s) will go down in Florida history among the greatest moments that the Football team has ever seen. I was at the last game saved by a blocked FG (Auburn 2002) and that was absolute pandemonium in the stands. Considering the stakes involved in this game (on a number of levels) I would imagine that the scene in the stands after this block was somewhere between bat-shit crazy and, well…I guess I don’t have to imagine.

Reggie Lewis: He’s never going to receive enough credit, but for my money, Reggie Lewis made the most important play of the day by anybody not named Jarvis. His perfectly timed slap-away at Sidney Rice’s sure TD catch kept Florida in the game and completely changed the complexion of a second half that seemed to be quickly getting away from the Gators. I’ve watched the replay at least a dozen times and he could not have played the ball or the receiver any better than he did. The fact that he made the play against Sidney Rice made it all the more clutch and spectacular.

Urban Meyer: By now, nearly every Florida fan has commented that “Zook would’ve lost this game”, and they’re right. Personally I don’t think that it would’ve even come down to a FG if Towlie was still running the show in Gainesville. I’m not completely sold on all things Urban just yet, (His team’s still seem a little erratic and sloppy to me for a guy who pushes discipline so much) but he’s instilled a sense of pride and overall toughness in Gator football that I haven’t seen since the mid-90s and that alone is remarkable. His players believe in him and he reflects that belief in his players. He deserves a ton of credit for the changes he’s made in this program.

Florida fans: I wasn’t there but I’ve spoken to two separate people who were in attendance on Saturday who both said that the Swamp was “louder than I’ve ever heard it” on the final USC drive. I’ve been in that Stadium when its so loud that you think the ground is gonna open up right there at the 50 yard line, so it must’ve something special in that Stadium on Saturday night. Florida’s crowd never gave up. Florida’s players never gave up either. Pardon me if I think that there’s some connection there.

Thank god for Western Carolina this week...

Pants Party in Piscataway...everyone's invited!

Well, that certainly changes the National Championship picture doesn’t it?

I predicted earlier this week that Rutgers would pull off the upset against Louisville. To be honest, I was hoping for a Scarlet Knight victory as much (probably more) as I was expecting one. I hadn’t watched Rutgers play much this season, save for a quarter or two during lulls in some of the other, more “marquee” games that I was watching. While I knew they had talent, especially on offense, I didn’t know if they had enough talent and depth to overcome a very talented and well coached Louisville team. The one factor that I continually believed could swing this game in Rutgers’ favor was the same factor that so often changes college football games: Emotion. The emotion of playing the biggest game in school history could propel the Scarlet Knights to victory, if they could handle it. Conversely, the emotional hangover of winning the biggest game in school history might, just might render Louisville unable to play with the intensity and focus it would need to overcome the collective emotion of 60,000+ newly minted Rutgers fans.

While I’d like to say it was all emotion that carried Rutgers to victory last night, its simply not true. Sure it played a role, but to say the emotions of the moment carried Rutgers would be discounting the defensive adjustments made by Greg Schiano and his staff at halftime. It would overlook the yeoman’s effort by Ray Rice and the patience of Rutgers’ offensive staff. They never panicked, continually sticking with their game plan in order to wear down Louisville’s defense. It would ignore the brilliant call on the third down pass to Brian Leonard. A play that Rutgers’s offensive coordinator had seemingly waited all night to call. Rutgers won last night because they believed in each other. They believed in their coaches and the game plan set out in front of them. But most of all, they believed that they deserved to win. That all their hard work and sacrifice had prepared them for a moment like this. That belief is what made Jeremy Ito’s second chance FG possible (that and an awful offsides penalty) because all the emotion in the world can’t bring a team back from three TDs down if they don’t believe.

Now, the National Championship picture becomes much more muddled than it was just 24 hours ago. Over the next few weeks you’re going to hear an endless amount of talk about who “deserves” to play in Glendale on January 8. Only, you won’t hear any of that from me. Not one word. You know why, because there is WAY too much football still to be played. If last night’s game teaches us anything, it’s that we know nothing about college football. So sit back, shutup and watch what promises to be an exciting finish to an increasingly unpredictable season of college football. Speaking of which…

A big weekend is upon us. Actually, it’s a big weekend for the University of Florida. For the first time since he lost to Tennessee in December 2001, Steve Spurrier will be walking back into Ben Hill Griffin Stadium to coach a football game. Only this time, he’ll be doing it as the head coach of an opponent. To say this will be weird is a vast understatement. It was weird last year when he stood on the opposite sideline from the Gators and directed South Carolina to a victory. When he walks out of the tunnel on Saturday afternoon wearing black and garnet, it will be downright nauseating. As someone who enjoyed the final years of the Spurrier era as a student at Florida, the thought of booing SOS was near blasphemy. How could you ever boo the coach who made the University of Florida a national power in football? What could drive somebody to hurl insults at a man who rescued the Gator football program from a devastating probation? That same man trading his orange and blue for the colors of a division rival, that’s what. Make no mistake about it, I do not hate Spurrier. Far from it, I love him for all he’s done for the University and for the countless victories I reveled in that he was largely responsible for. However, that is now the past and he’s become just another opposing SEC coach for whom I want nothing more than embarrassment at the hands of the Gators. It’s that simple really.

If it weren’t for LSU’s last second victory in Knoxville last weekend, the Gators would be playing this game for the SEC Eastern Division title. As it stands, the Gators will play this game for two things: pride and national championship aspirations. Frankly, I think this is a good thing. A game against Spurrier in the Swamp is already rife with emotions for fans, coaches (don’t underestimate the shadow that Spurrier still casts over the football program) and players and will present unique challenges for all parties involved. To say nothing of the “revenge factor” involved in Saturday’s contest, which is significant (last year’s loss to USC kept UF out of the SEC Championship game). With all of that emotion to manage, the last thing that this team needs is the added dimension of playing for a berth in the SEC Championship game.

With all the hoopla and discussion of the head coaching matchup and Spurrier’s return to Gainesville, it can be easy to forget that there is an actual football game to be played. With that in mind, I’d like to touch on a couple aspects of this game that I’ve been mulling over the last few days.

Two QB system: Florida’s two QB system has been the talk of analysts all year long (even though it’s not a true two QB sysem). However, the real story is the re-emergence of a two QB system for SOS. The performance of Blake Mitchell last Saturday evening was nothing short of spectacular. He looked like a vintage Spurrier QB for the better part of the second half, throwing fades, deep outs and slants like he was under center in Gainesville, circa 1995. Not only did Mitchell re-establish himself as the starter, he also managed to resurrect the lost season of Sidney Rice. As my friend John said on Tuesday, Mitchell has an undeniable chemistry with Rice that can’t be overlooked. Mitchell looks for Rice and, more often than not, he is successful when throwing his way. This is huge for the Gamecocks. Rice is their most explosive offensive player and getting him involved is paramount to the success of their offense. Furthermore, Mitchell’s ascension back to the starting role will allow Spurrier to use Syvelle Newton in a number of ways throught Saturday’s game. He provides USC with a completely different look at QB than the more traditional stylings of Mitchell and should prove useful in frustrating Florida’s now wafer thin defensive line. Beyond that, I would also expect to see Newton line up at wide receiver and running back throughout the course of Saturday’s game.

Conclusion: By promoting Mitchell back to starter, Spurrier has added two weapons to an offense badly in need of playmakers while also making his offense much harder to effectively gameplan against.

Marcus Thomas: There’s much to say other than, goodbye. Thomas was unquestionably one of the two most valuable players on the Gator defense. His presence alone made the players around him, specifically the rest of the defensive line, more effective. He commanded double teams and created pressure up the middle, thereby disrupting opponents’ offensive schemes. Put simply, impact defensive tackles like Marcus Thomas don’t grow on trees and can’t be easily replaced. One of the best things about a player like Thomas is that opposing coordinators have to game plan around their presence. Losing Thomas leaves UF with only one such player on their defense, Reggie Nelson. While Nelson remains the marquee player on Florida’s D, it is much easier for an offense to gameplan around one difference maker than two and that alone makes Florida far more vulnerable than they were just two weeks ago.

Furthermore, Florida’s once deep D-line is now much thinner than when the season began, due to the dismissal of Thomas as well as the ACL tear of backup DT Javier Estopinan. Florida still has plenty of talent along it defensive front, it just happens to be talent that is a little lighter in the ass than most would prefer. Will this affect Florida come Saturday? Most certainly. The defense can’t (nor should it) expect to stuff the run as effectively as it has most of the season. Will this prove to be a fatal flaw for Florida (alliteration, mmm) come Saturday? It’s hard to say. If USC can manage to run at the Florida defense like they did in Columbia last year then that will set up the play-action pass for Spurrier. If SOS is emboldened by some early success running the ball, then the Florida secondary could be in for an awfully long day of chasing open receivers. Beyond Saturday, the absence of Thomas makes Florida’s trek towards a BCS Bowl and (possibly) the National Title game far more arduous than it was previously. For the record, I hold no ill will towards Marcus Thomas for his actions. He’s a young kid who had too many responsibilities for himself to handle. He was a very good player at the University of Florida and I wish him well in the NFL. I just wish he could’ve found a way to balance all the aspects of his life for another couple of months because the Gators really could’ve used him.

Other than the loss of Thomas, all the right things have been happening for this Gator team these past few weeks. However, this team still has a long road ahead of them before they can even begin to think of playing for a National Title. The first step on that road starts tomorrow afternoon against the only coach who’s ever guided them down that road before. Life (and college football) can be awfully strange sometimes.

A few last items:

- I can still like SOS for another 27 hours or so, right?

- Alright, this is not encouraging. It looks as if Florida may be without the services of their (now) second best defensive player as well as team leader.

- One last time: RUMSFELD!!!!

He'd like you to meet him at the "trap". Where, evidently, it's going down.

You're probably looking at next week.

Somehow I managed to violently wrench my neck on Tuesday afternoon while lifting weights. I'm not exactly sure when it happened during my workout, but by the time I was done with dinner on Tuesday it had become quite apparent that I had done something seriously wrong to my neck. It was so bad that I ended up calling my Halloween celebration off early and heading home to bed. Of course, I wouldn't actually go to sleep once I went to bed. My neck was so out of whack that I spent the entire night trying to find a position (any position) that wouldn't make me want to howl in pain. I wouldn't be so lucky. To make matters worse, I woke up (if you can count what I did as sleeping) to a fever and a severly congested head. Most of that has subsided by now. Unfortunately, my neck is only slightly better than it was yesterday. I'm back at work this morning, if only because I didn't want to use two consecutive sick days on my damned neck. However, if things don't start to improve dramatically there's a very real chance that I'll be leaving work to go home and rest. It may sound like I'm being an enormous pussy (which I am) but I'm in genuine agony over here today and I don't care what you think about me and my threshold for pain. So, why am I telling you this?

What the fuck is she smiling about?

Because, there's no way that I'll be able to write anything today or (possibly) tomorrow. If I'm significantly better tomorrow I'll get something up. If not, you're looking at next week before I can contribute anything mildy interesting to the blogoshpere. Believe me, it hurts me far more than it hurts you.

The freaks come out night, the freaks come out ni-ight...

That song always makes me think of Halloween and, as a result, I always end up singing the refrain over and over again on Halloween night. It just works perfect, at least for me I'm not sure why, other than the fact that Whodini rules and, well, the song is catchy as hell.

Even though it's Tuesday, I'm still catching up on work and recharging my batteries after one of the most ridiculous and completely awesome weekends I've had in quite some time. However, I didn't want to let Halloween pass without at least passing along a very generic "Happy Halloween" to everyone. Even though I'm still a little tired from this past weekend, and definitely don't need to drink for probably another couple of days, I'm still planning on going out tonight. Maybe once I have kids (HA!) I won't want find it physically impossible to stay home on Halloween. Then again, maybe not (I do adore the sauce). I mean, how many other holidays cause children, teens and full grown adults to all dress up and act like complete lunatics? Other than Arbor Day, I can't think of another.

So there it is...Happy Halloween you bunch of losers. Go out and get drunk, or take the sage advice of Bushwick Bill and rob "little kids for bags". Hell, if you manage your time wisely you might be able to kill two birds with one stone. While I sincerely hope you choose to participate in all that tonight has to offer, there's one guy who I can guarantee you won't be celebrating Halloween tonight. That guy is Keyon Dooling. Don't believe me? Just read this quote from Keyon:

"I was never a big Halloween guy. I never really understood it. I didn’t go trick-or-treating as a kid. I still don’t know what it’s about."

Umm, alright then. I, for one, had no idea that Halloween could be such an abstract concept.

Lookin at my...fuck it. It's about that time.

Yep. That's right. Today marks the begining of what promises to be a most eventful and booze fueled weekend. The Annual Florida-Georgia game, also known as (Seriously, just deal with it Adams) the World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party. While many people won't be descending upon the great(?) city of Jacksonville until Friday afternoon, I'll be arriving tonight at around 8:30 in order to pick up some fellow revelers from the airport. From there, we're off to our hotel right near The Landings where the beer will flow like wine and the women, well, they'll be really drunk and (possibly) very slutty. Sounds like fun don't it?

I'll be riding with Vitas up to Jacksonville this evening so that we can pick up Jerry, TJ and Wheelhouse regulars Salts and Greg for their first collective cocktail party experience. On Friday, more trouble comes our way as my buddies Berto and Socks make their way into town after Socks' flight comes in from San Francisco (what a gay). Salts has suggested that we all try "not to die" this weekend, which I think is a total chicken shit move, but since it seems I'm outnumbered on this one I too will try and comply with his request. In all seriousness, I'm really pumped about this weekend. The Cocktail Party is always a good time and we've got a huge crew of guys and a couple of prime hotel rooms this year. Things couldn't look much better from where I'm standing.

Snobs & Liars

That pretty much sums up my day today. I'll be working a political event from 3-8 pm this evening and I'll be surrounded by people who are one or the other (or both) for the entirety of this event. As you may have guessed, I'm none too pleased about this. I find politricks (thanks Sheed) mildy annoying and politicians mind numbingly annoying so tonight's festivities should test my famoulsy thin patience to its absolute breaking point. Hopefully, I'll be able to contain my rage long enough to avoid dumping a pot of coffee on some state representatives head in front of hundreds of their constituents. Hopefully, I'm not making any promises at this point. So that's my day today. An approximately 12 hour workday that includes over 5 hours of poltical douchebaggery at its finest. Did I mention that this event is out-fucking-doors? No? Yeah, well, it is...in a park. Now, I wasn't a poly-sci major in college or anything but something about a poltical event in a park seems, well, extremely low rent. I can only guess what kind of food is going to be served tonight. Beanie Weanies? Frog Legs? I think I'm going to have to make a concerted effort to keep the verbal sarcasm and vitriol to a minimum tonight, lest I reveal my disdain for everyone involved in this event while in mixed company. Hopefully, the thoughts of what awaits me in just over day will keep me placated for the duration of tonight's activities. That's really my only hope at this point. That, and the visions of Chris Carpenter dominating last night. Because, that, was freaking sweet.

I'll try and post a little something tomorrow before I head out to Jacksonville.

There is NOTHING quite like Playoff Baseball.

There's very little chance that I'm going to be able to write anything that even approaches a sensible and/or analytical recap of last night's Game 7. No, I'm not going to completely ignore the game in this space like last weekend's loss to Auburn (Why oh why was Tebow not in on 3rd and 2 at the Auburn 6? I'll never stop believing Mullen and Meyer outwitted themselves on that play. Stop...think about last night. Ahh, yes. That's nice.). Rather, I'm still so jacked/fried from last night's emotional roller coaster to effectively sum up the events that happened late last night as I sat in my house all by my lonesome. I don't care if the NL is far inferior to the Al, that was a classic Game 7. A bonafide classic. Clutch performances by unlikely heroes on both sides in an absolutely electric atmosphere. I've been alternately pumping my fist (lightly) and smiling all morning as I read through various accounts of last night's clincher. I think I finally understand what my friend Kurt was going through when he engaged me in the most awkward man hug in recorded human history after Aaron Boone's Game 7 HR over Boston in 2003. Thank God I was by myself last night and the only thing I had the chance to hug was a frosty bottle of Jager.

In the interest of attempting to capture some of last night's emotions, I'll detail a couple of the phone calls exchanged by my father and I during the latter innings of last night's win.

10:03 pm: I was literally halfway off my couch and in mid-yell when, all of the sudden, Endy Chavez decided to make the most improbable catch since Angels in the Outfield. I immediately sat my ass down and watched the replay of Chavez's catch over and over and over. Chavez is one of the nicest professional athletes that I've ever met but I want to stab him the fucking eye right now. And I would, if I wasn't paralyzed by the agony of the emotional swing that Chavez just inflected on me. After a minute (or an hour I'm not sure) I pick up the phone and call my Dad. He answers, which is a good sign as I feared for his health, and says:

Dad: That's unbelievable. Best catch I've ever seen.
Me: "He barely even..."
Dad (cutting me off): I know. He snowconed it. That was the game winner right there.
Me: You're right. Fuck.
Dad: We really need Suppan to shut them down this inning.
Me: Yeah, we think Shea is crazy now.
Dad: Okay...Bye.

I'm not sure what my Dad was doing during the bottom of the inning. Me, I was cursing Endy Chavez only to stop cursing him and start cursing Scott Rolen. As soon as the ball left Rolen's hands I was convinced the game was over. Of course, I tried to do my part by cracking yet another Budweiser (I don't even drink Bud and I bought a six pack last night in hopes of sending some good karma the Cardinals' way. Yep, I'm 29 and have a Masters degree. I'm sure this is exactly how my parents pictured my life progressing when they sent me away to college.) I don't know if the Budweiser worked but it certainly didn't hurt. Neither did Jose Valentin's complete inability to hit a decent curveball. Jeff Suppan will always have a special place in my heart after that performance in the sixth inning (ngs...okay, sgs). My Dad calls again.

Dad: Wow.
Me: Can we really win this thing?
Dad: I'm not sure. I just know it's not over yet, somehow.

Cut to the top of the ninth. I'm once again cursing Scott Rolen as he quickly falls behind 0-2. However, the next thing I know he's managed a single and is standing on first. Yadier Molina strides to the plate. I wrote about unlikely heroes a couple of days ago and he would certainly fall into that ever expanding category (Suppan's already in at this point). He hits the first pitch deep, really deep. Can Chavez get to that? No. I let out a primal scream that has to have awoken at least one of my neighbors. As the inning ends my phone rings.

Dad: It's all on Wainwright now.
Me: God that's a lot of pressure for a rookie. I'm worried.
Dad: I've been worried for 5 hours. What's another five minutes.
Me: Bye.

I'll tell you what another five minutes is...excruciating. Once Cliff Floyd comes to the plate I'm practically hiding my face behind my hands. I can't stand it anymore. Wainwright shows some serious onions and gets Floyd. Reyes goes down quick (Though initially I could've sworn that ball would drop). Now Wainwright starts to lose it a bit and ends up walking Lo Duca. Here comes motherfucking Carlos Beltran and his magical mole. I hate that guy. Nobody has murdered the Cardinals in the postseason like Beltran. Ok, that's a lie. Babe Ruth gave it the Redbirds worse...that's comforting. Before I even have much time to freak out it's 0-2. Now I'm completely freaking out. Wainwright drops the hammer on Beltran as he stands there motionless. I let out another primal scream. Cards win. Are you kidding me? CARDS WIN!!!!

As I sit there in disbelief, my phone rings one last time.

Dad: How's the World Series sound to you?
Me: Pretty fucking good. What a game.
Dad: Yeah. I don't think I'll be go to sleep anytime soon. Might as well crack a Bud.
Me: One step ahead of you old man. Did you wake Mom up just now?
Dad: I think so. Who cares, the Cards are in the World Series.
Me: Unbelievable.

We stayed on the phone going over the game for another few minutes before we finally hung up. Of course, I was a long way away from going to bed so I stayed up with a beer and a shot and watched as much coverage as possible. What a fucking night.

I need a hero...

Remember that song? Of course you do. Well, the 1985 Cardinals kind of adopted it as their theme song. Honestly, I'm not sure if the team adopted it as much as the fans adopted it. Since I was 8 during the 1985 season, I'm going to guess it was the St. Louis fans if only because I have some trouble picturing Jack Clark, Vince Coleman and John Tudor belting out the lyrics to this in the locker room. Nevertheless, I've been thinking about this song with all the unlikely heroes that have stepped up for the Cardinals this fall. Guys like Scott Spiezio, Josh Kinney, and So Taguchi to name a few. However, no Cardinal player this fall has been as unlikely a hero as one Jeff Weaver. Weaver's performance during these playoffs (and especially this NLCS) is nothing if not improbable. In fact, I'm not the least bit ashamed to say that I've become a Jeff Weaver fan. Okay, I'm a little ashamed. Sure, he's a douchebag stoner, but now he's a douchebag stoner who's going to receive far more on the free agent market this winter than he deserves. Well, at least more than his record prior to this year's playoffs indicates that he deserves.

Frankly, I wouldn't be surprised if the Cardinals tried to bring him back next year. We all know that Dave Duncan loves reclamation projects (Have you seen his wife? Good god.) and, honestly, there's not a gaggle of quality starting pitchers out on the market right now. (I know, I know. I just used the word "quality" in reference to Jeff Weaver and I wasn't talking about his stash. I can't really believe it either). With that said, the Cards would be royally screwed without his contributions thus far in the playoffs and that's not something that I ever thought I'd write.

Obviously, tonight's game is beyond huge for both teams. The Mets are in a must-win situation and the Cards have their "ace" going in a Game 6 on the road. To be perfectly honest, I'm pretty nervous about Carpenter tonight. He seems to have some trouble managing his emotions early in big games and therefore pitches erratic in the opening inning or two. I'm not sure if the Cards can afford something like that tonight. Shea's gonna be jacked and I fear this game could get away (in a big way) from St. Louis if the Mets get out to an early lead.

Disclaimer: I know this post is disjointed but I never intended on writing much more than "Big game tonight. St. Louis can clinch...Go Cards." However, the spirit (or spirits, you decide) took over and I felt compelled to write a little more than your basic "Game tonight" post. Whatever. I just wasted an extra five minutes of your afternoon, so stop bitching

The kind of Saturday that's resulted in a divorce or two...

I’m going to keep it rather short today (I swear) with a couple of random comments on last night’s NLCS Game 1 and then some more thoughts on tomorrow’s Florida-Auburn matchup that will (apparently) be available on all 17 ESPN networks.

NLCS Game 1

Despite the loss, I wasn’t too distraught with last night’s results. The Cardinals played pretty well and actually could’ve scored some early runs if it weren’t for a handful of hard hit balls being hit directly at the Mets defense. At least two of those drives ended innings that had serious run scoring potential, so it’s tough for me to get too bent out of shape about the Cardinals overall play. (I don’t want to talk about Pujols getting doubled off by Beltran, ever).

Sure, I screamed “FUCK!!!” the moment that Beltran’s bat made contact with Weaver’s offering in the sixth but, even with that, I came away somewhat encouraged by the overall performance of St. Louis. I’m sure that plenty of people want to blame somebody for Beltran’s homer (Weaver, LaRussa, Tim Robbins) but it was more a case of a great player (Beltran) jumping on Weaver’s mistake and making the most of it than anything in particular that was done so egregiously wrong. I’ve said, numerous times, that if you get 5 good innings from Weaver in a start then you should thank your lucky stars and go to the bullpen, immediately. However, I was all for Weaver going out to start the sixth after the way he had pitched through the first 5 innings. I mean, it’s not like the Cardinals’ bullpen is exactly a murderer’s row of late inning efficiency these days. With that said, I would’ve pulled Weaver as soon as LoDuca singled to start the sixth. They gave Weaver a shot to keep it going and he didn’t get it done. At that point, I’d have gotten Tyler Thompson in to face Beltran. Of course, hindsight is 20/20 and it’s still tough to hammer LaRussa too much for his decision to leave Weaver in. St. Louis didn’t lose the game right then and there. The Cards would've loved to get both games at Shea but I doubt they'd tell you they really expected that to happen. Now, if Carpenter can’t keep the Cards close late into the game tonight, well, then they might be in trouble. Big trouble. Carpenter is their ace and tonight’s his night to carry the banner for his team.

A couple of more thoughts:

- What’s Beltran make, like $18 million a year? With that kind of money you would think that he could afford to have that monstrous mole of his removed. If I remember correctly, Uncle Buck said it only cost a quarter to have a rat gnaw that type of thing off your face. Of course, that was the 80’s so it might be closer to $5 by now.

- Tom Glavine’s at-bat music is Lil’ John? Really? How did this happen? You could’ve given me 200 guesses on the artist whom Glavine uses for his at-bat music and I never would’ve even gotten close to Lil’ John (Lil’ Scrappy, maybe). I guess all those years in Atlanta had more of an affect on Tom then we thought, huh?


Auburn-Florida

When I first looked at Florida’s 2006 schedule earlier this year, I put my head through a plate glass window. When I managed to clean myself up and remove all the loose glass from my scalp I took another look and noticed the insane stretch of games during the month of October. It was at this point that I poured peroxide over my fresh wounds in an attempt to quell the pains of anxiety that were pounding in my skull, to no avail. Eventually, I settled down enough to start deciphering the schedule with a little more precision. Through all of this, it became clear to me that the game which presented the greatest challenge to the Gators this year (and there were many) was the matchup at Auburn. There were three primary reasons for this:

Homefield Advantage: Coming into the season, this game was, in my opinion, the Gators toughest test on the road. Think about that for a second…that’s pretty impressive when you consider that Florida faces it’s two biggest rivals (FSU, Tennessee) on the road this year, and that was before we found out the game would be a night game. Not only would this game be a road game in one of the nations toughest (and most underrated) places to play, but it would also be against the team which most pundits had anointed as the SEC’s most talented. Finally, as if playing in Jordan-Hare, at night, against a team that had an SEC win streak of 19 games coming into the season weren’t enough, there’s this: Auburn has six all-time wins at home against Top 5 opponents. Three of those six wins have come against the University of Florida.

Defense: There’s plenty of defense in the SEC, this we know. In fact, you’d be hard pressed to name a conference in the country that can even compete with the SEC when it comes to standout defenses or defensive players. The main attribute that most people point to when attempting to explain the difference between SEC defenses and the rest of the country is speed. Defenses in the SEC are scary fast. Urban Meyer learned this firsthand last year during the first half of the SEC season. This is where Auburn comes in. Even in the SEC, Auburn’s defense is supremely fast. Former Defensive Coordinator Gene Chizik preferred smaller, faster defensive players and recruited justly (Don't believe me, Auburn's top four linebackers average 215 lbs.)

Though he’s left for Texas, Chizik left Auburn with a bevy of extremely fast, if a little undersized, defensive players. That’s precisely why the Auburn defense scares me so much. They don't overpower their opponents as much as run right past them. Florida’s offensive line has stood up to some stern tests so far this year. However, they haven’t faced a defense with the overall speed of Auburn, and they certainly haven’t done so in front of 90,000 screaming fans. Make no mistake, tomorrow night’s game will be the ultimate test for not only this Gator offensive line, but for this entire offense.

Kenny Irons: The bane of every South Carolina fans existence himself. I have a friend who attended USC who swears he’ll punch Lou Holtz in the face if he ever gets the chance, all because of Kenny Irons. You know what? I don’t blame him. In fact, I’d have already found a way to make it happen if I was him. Simply put, Kenny Irons is a beast. He’s the total package as far as running backs go. He possesses breakaway speed, great vision, superior cutback ability and a force of will that allows him to constantly break tackles and generate extra yardage after contact. He scares the bejesus out of me. Florida boasts the nation’s #2 rush defense but they have yet to face a truly elite back this season. The closest that they’ve seen is Alabama’s Kenneth Darby, and he hasn’t been the nearly the back that he was in 2005 yet this year. If Florida can’t contain Irons and force Auburn into 3rd and medium or long, then the entire game changes for Florida. This Gator defense is a different breed from those that’s we’ve seen in years past. They are tougher, deeper, fast, and more physical. However, they haven’t erased the memories of so many “soft” Gator defenses of the past just yet. At least not in the eyes of many pundits on the national scene. Saturday night is their chance to do just that. If they contain Irons and escape the plains with a win, then the whole country will have no chance but to believe, no, know that this is a different Gator squad, a tough Gator squad and a Gator squad that can no longer be overlooked.

The Cardinals also happen to be playing in Game 3 of the NLCS at the same time as the Gators game at Auburn. I'm not really sure how I'm going to handle the combined stress of these two games at once, though I'm pretty sure that alcohol will be involved. Prominently involved.

Reggie Nelson, and a some booze should make Saturday a little easier on my nerves.

Let's try this again.

Hopefully the Cardinals and Mets can get their NLCS matchup started tonight before MLB has to step in and change around the rest of the schedule for the series. We don't want that, well...because, MLB and Bud Selig could fuck up a wet dream. That's why.

Go Cards!

Tommy Herr was unavailable...

I'm a little too tired (read: hungover) today after celebrating my birthday last night to spend much time posting my various thoughts from the recent three day weekend (Yes, I had Columbus Day off, suckers). However, I didn't want the afternoon to get away without mentioning tonight's NLCS Game 1 between former NL East rivals St. Louis and New York.

There was once a time when I hated the Mets with intensity and passion. The kind of complete and irrational hatred that only 8-12 year old boys who religiously follow baseball can muster. Those days have long since passed due to a combination of divisional realignment, time and acquisition of a life that doesn't revolve around fart jokes, baseball and blurry Cinemax. With that said, I'm going to try and recapture those days (not the Cinemax part...that's why I have a high speed wireless connection at home) over the next few weeks as I hold out hope that the Cardinals can continue to defy the odds and wade their way through the stress laden morass of Playoff Baseball. So, in the spirit of October, allow me to say:

Fuck New York and fuck the Mets. Oh yeah, fuck Gary Carter too. That guy always annoyed the hell out of me.

Big day, BIG day...

The Cardinals can close out their NLDS series against the Padres today with a win in St. Louis. That would be nice.

Of course, not quite as nice the Gators beating LSU for the first time time in three years. That would be, dare I say, amazing. And, would more than likely result in a very long and boozy evening of celebration.

Corso Beats His Wife...

In honor of Gameday's first appearance of the year in Gainesville, I figured I ought to break a line from the greatest sign I've ever seen during a Gameday telecast. Some may say that it's a bit harsh. I say that dirty Nole has it coming...in spades.

In an effort to keep my Gator columns more enjoyable for most of you, I’m going to try and keep them in some type of format from here on out. I’m hoping that the constraints of organization will force me to pare down my thoughts a bit thus making these posts a little more concise and less like the rambling tangents that often accompany any verbal assessment of the University of Florida’s Football team. With that in mind, I’m going to break down some key components of last week’s game against Alabama and then address those aspects with regard to what they will mean this coming Saturday against LSU.

Offense:

This unit is far ahead of last year’s offense at this same stage. The line struggled early on against Bama but managed to get going early in the second quarter as they settled into their assignments against Bama’s unorthodox 3-3-5 defense and dominated the line of scrimmage on their way to a 95 yard TD drive. From this point on, the offense began to hit its stride. Their was plenty of time in the passing game and the running game really started to pick up in the second half as Florida’s line began to wear on Bama’s defense while opening up some huge holes for DeShawn Wynn and Kestahn Moore. As the O-Line’s play picked up, Chris Leak and his receivers became steadily more comfortable working against an experienced Alabama secondary, making site adjustments (Caldwell’s TD) and exploiting mismatches in the passing game by using the size of Dallas Baker and the speed of Jemalle Cornelius. While Leak ended up with some impressive stats, he was erratic in the game’s early stages, short hopping a couple of throws and nearly throwing an interception deep in his own territory.

What this means for Saturday:

While Florida’s O-line is a much improved unit, it will have to be even more prepared come Saturday afternoon. LSU’s defense is better and faster than anything the Gator’s have seen thus far. Furthermore, D-Coordinator Bo Pelini is both solid in teaching fundamentals and innovative in his employment of his defensive troops. Florida’s uncertainty in it’s blocking schemes was exposed last year by Pelini, especially in five wide sets. The O-Line will have to be quick and decisive against LSU if Florida is to take advantage of any opportunities afforded to it by the LSU defense. If the O-Line can hold its own against a dominating D-Line it will open up time for Chris Leak and his receivers. Leak will need to avoid staring down his primary receiver against LSU’s experienced and talented secondary. Twice this season, Leak has had sure interceptions deep in his own territory negated by penalty (Tenn.) or drops (Bama). If Leak makes this mistake again, LSU will almost certainly make him pay. Beyond Leak, UF’s receivers are going to have to win their fair share of one-on-one battles if the Gators are to march to victory. LSU frequently employed man coverage last year, virtually daring a Gator receiver to beat them. More often than not, Gator receivers couldn’t make LSU pay for these gambles which left Leak scrambling for his life. Perhaps, the biggest aid to the passing game would be a solid rushing attack. While Florida has rushed far more cromulently thus far this season, Saturday represents a new challenge. With DeShawn Wynn possibly injured (certainly hobbled), the Gators will need increased contributions from the likes of Moore, Tim Tebow, and Billy Latsko (both as a blocker and runner).

Defense:

While Florida’s defense is currently ranked 4th in the nation in scoring defense, it has not always resembled the dominating unit that one would expect when presented with such a statistic. This was evident against Alabama, as the Gators defense allowed Alabama to move the ball with surprising regularity in between the 20s. However, once the Tide came close to scoring territory, UF’s defense repeatedly came up with the big play or plays needed to fight off Alabama. Whether it was a timely sack (Derrick Harvey) or a crucial pass breakup (Reggie Lewis), the Gators always seemed to come up with the right play at exactly the right time.

While it’s easy to be happy with only allowing 6 offensive points to Alabama, one must be concerned with the relative lack of pressure generated by Florida’s front four. The Gator D clearly misses the push created by Marcus Thomas up the middle. His presence, and the double teams it brought, opened up ends Harvey, Jarvis Moss and Ray McDonald for one-on-one matchups on the outside. Without Thomas, Florida has struggled to consistently generate a pass rush thereby leaving its inexperienced corners to deal with Bama’s receivers on the outside. The results were a number of big gains by Bama receivers in the short to intermediate passing game, due largely to the space being given by the UF secondary in order to avoid giving up the big play over the top.

What this means for Saturday:

LSU has not been able to run the ball with any measure of success thus far this season. Much of this is due to a relatively inexperienced offensive line that is still learning the ropes. The rest of the blame falls squarely on the shoulders of tailbacks Alli Broussard and Justin Vincent. Neither back has shown the explosiveness they had prior to their injuries and look tentative in their cuts. This shouldn’t change much this week against Florida. The Gators boast the nation’s #4 rush defense and have consistently forced their opponents to abandon the run game in the second half in an attempt to effectively move the ball.

Of course, LSU has another side of the offensive coin, a devastatingly effective passing game. A passing game that has led to LSU Offensive Coordinator Jimbo Fisher (gotta love the SEC) calling far more pass plays than at any time during JaMarcus Russell’s tenure in Baton Rouge. Russell has responded by lighting up secondaries as few before in Tiger country. While I’m not (and never have been) a huge fan of Russell, one thing he does extremely well is throw the deep ball. He’s done it often this year, and with a large measure of success. With a group of receivers possibly more talented than their counterparts at UF, Russell has a large bevy of weapons at his disposal in the passing game. UF’s D will have to find ways to pressure Russell and force him to check down out of his primary reads. If the green Gator corners are forced to matchup one-on-one with the likes of Dwayne Bowe, Craig Davis and Early Doucet then it could be a very, very long day for the Gator defense. To be effective, the Gators must get pressure on Russell quickly without allowing him to move out of the pocket and create opportunities downfield. While blitzing linebackers up the middle will certainly aid this plan of attack, a push from the middle of UF’s defensive line is crucial against LSU. All of these objectives are attainable, especially against a young and banged up LSU O-line playing in a very hostile environment. It is incumbent upon the members of the Gator D-Line to win their one-on-one battles when they get the chance. Furthermore, Florida must contain LSU’s ground game and make them one dimensional. If LSU can effectively run the ball, Florida’s defense will not be able to put enough pressure on Russell to disrupt the Tigers’ passing game.

Special Teams:

I’m not going to spend much time on Florida’s Special Teams, other than to say that they must show marked improvement on Saturday. Other than some excitement courtesy of Brandon James, the Gator Special Teams have been a major disappointment so far this season. Florida will need big days from Chris Hetland (K), Eric Wilbur (P) if they are to come out victorious in this game. Additionally, UF could use a field position boost from return man James on either kickoff or punt return duty with kickoff being more likely, due to the excellence of LSU punter Chris Jackson.

Slow Starts:

Florida once again stumbled out of the gates against Bama, struggling defensively to get pressure while the offense was only able to top their ineffectiveness moving the ball by coughing up a TD producing fumble. This was symptomatic of most of the Gator’s game this fall. The Gators have trailed during the first half of every game but one (UCF) so far this season and have given up opening TDs to Tennessee, Southern Miss. and Alabama. Both offense and defense seem to sleepwalk through the games first stanza, only awakening when pushed by their opponents.

What this means for Saturday:

Problems, big problems. Florida cannot afford another slow start against LSU. To be successful, UF must come out hitting on all cylinders and energize the home crowd. An early score or turnover could rattle some of the Tigers and lead give Florida the kind of home field advantage that can be so valuable in game as tight as this looks to be. Letting LSu settle in and get comfortbale in the Swamp could have devastating effects on the game's outcome.

Missing In Action:

Florida looks to be without two, and possibly three, of their biggest contributors on Saturday afternoon. Marcus Thomas is out for his third consecutive game and his presence will certainly be missed. With Thomas manning the middle, he creates mismatches along the outside for the rest of the defensive line while also causing a fair amount of havoc in his own right. Another player who may be out for a third game (or fourth if you take out the first 5 minutes against Tenn.) is Percy Harvin. The electric freshman had already become a starter and difference maker for Florida before a high ankle sprain against UT sent him to the sidelines. He is, possibly, Florida’s most dangerous and versatile weapon on offense. Without him, the offense loses some of it’s effectiveness. However, aside from Chris Leak, the absence of no player causes as many problems for the Florida offense as DeShawn Wynn. Wynn started slowly against Bama but really began to hit his stride late in the first half. He continued to heat up early in the second half and looked to be well on his way to a third consecutive 100 yard performance before spraining his ankle midway through the third quarter. The SEC’s fourth leading rusher is the big, bruising back that Florida needs to move the chains and keep defenses off balance.

What this means for Saturday:

As I discussed earlier, the Florida defense will have to find a way to get pressure on Russell without Thomas. If the Gators cannot generate this pressure without employing too many blitzes, I see little chance in Florida pulling out the victory. As for Harvin, I doubt he will be 100% on Saturday. However, his presence on the field will force the defense to adjust its coverage to deal with the threat of him. If able to play, getting Harvin involved early is paramount. Harvin’s early involvement in the offensive scheme will energize the crowd and his teammates while also making the Gator offense much more difficult for LSU to effectively match up with. Now, we come the most concerning absence, DeShawn Wynn. Long lambasted by coaches and fans, Wynn has emerged this year to provide Florida with the primary back it so sorely needed. If Wynn is unable to play on Saturday, it will put further pressure on Kestahn Moore to run with purpose and strength and prove himself a capable SEC tailback. Moore hasn’t had a lot of carries this year, but he’ll have to tote the rock for close 75 yards on Saturday in order to keep LSU’s defense honest. Furthermore, Tim Tebow will have to continue to do be the beastly QB/Gorilla/FB that he’s been all year. Without Wynn, he’ll get even more short yardage carries than he has so far.

Key Players: They’ll be no long narratives here, just a few players on each team that will be especially important to the outcome on Saturday.

Florida

Reggie Nelson: RFN has to play a great centerfield against a talented corps of receivers who are sure to test Florida’s corners deep. He may even be used in the nickel slot depending on the situation.

Tim Tebow: Simply put, the Gators can’t win if he doesn’t continue to grind out tough yards on the ground.

Billy Latsko: With Wynn out, the underrated Latsko’s blocking will play an even more vital role for Florida’s offense than it already does. Moore, Markus Manson and Brandon James are not big enough to shake off many tackles at the line. They’ll need Latsko to spring them into the second level. Latsko will also be key in pass protection against Bo Pelini’s blitzes.

Cornelius Ingram/Tate Casey: Florida needs to utilize these two talented and athletic tight ends to relieve pressure off of Leak both as blockers and within the pass game. Using these two in the flat and over the middle should be an especially effective way to attack LSU defense and slow down their blitzes.

LSU

LaRon Landry: Reggie Nelson’s counterpart is known as the nation’s best safety. He’ll line up all over the field on Saturday and will be a key component in pass coverage as well as Bo Pelini’s blitz packages.

Chevis Jackson/Jonathan Zenon: LSU two corners will determine much of what the Tigers can throw at Florida. If they can cover Gator receivers effectively, then that will allow Landry to play closer to the line of scrimmage and cause havoc within the Gator backfield. Florida cannot win if these two shutdown the likes of Caldwell, Cornelius and Baker.

Jacob Lester: He’s JaMarcus Russell’s favorite receiver underneath and LSU loves to pass to him out of the backfield on playaction. He routinely picks up 5-10 yards on this play and is LSU's most frequent weapon on short to intermediate third downs. Florida’s linebackers need to be keenly aware of him at all times.

Dwayne Bowe: The big (6’3”), physical Bowe killed UF last year with two crucial third down receptions. The first was a TD over Dee Webb late in the second quarter while the second occurred late in the 4th quarter and virtually sealed the LSU victory as Jospeh Addai scampered into the end zone for the winning TD just two plays later. Both balls were essentially jumpballs that Bowe won against smaller Gator DBs. UF must be physical with Bowe at the line of scrimmage and force him off his routes. Once the ball is in the air, it is imperative upon Gator defenders to play the ball and not Bowe. Reggie Lewis did a great job of this against DJ Hall last week in the fourth quarter. He’ll need to be even better on Saturday.

You’ll get no prediction from me in this space, not this week at least.

Oh yeah, the Cardinals are playing right now. Can they win two in a row?

Finally, since you're likely to be reading this on Friday, here's a good interview with ?uestlove from Playboy, seriously.


(9:42 PM) Update: Marcus Thomas is officially eligible to play against LSU. I literally yelled out loud just now when I read this.

Randomness...

Originally I was going to write up a recap of the Gators’ mildy maddening victory over Alabama on Saturday. However, with a HUGE game against LSU approaching this weekend, its a pretty sure bet that I’ll be tackling some Gator football related items in my next post. With that in mind I decided that it would probably be better for all of us if I held off on my post-game analysis until Thursday, when I’ll attempt to preview the upcoming SEC showdown against the Bayou Bengals within the context of Saturday’s win over the Tide.

What does all that mean? Not much actually, other than you’ll have to wait a little longer for my thoughts on the #5 ranked college football team in the nation…and today’s post is going to be a collection of random thoughts from the weekend that was…


- Somehow, someway the Cardinals managed to avoid infamy and squeeze their way into the playoffs. As much as it pains me to say this, the fans of St. Louis owe a debt of gratitude to the Atlanta Braves organization, as it’s highly unlikely that the Cards would’ve had the ability to qualify for the playoffs on their own merit. Of course, none of this really matters now. St. Louis’ playoff run starts today and, if things hold to form, it’s gonna be a whole hell of a lot closer to a 40 yard dash than a miraculous October marathon. Whatever, we’re still in the playoffs.

- It might be time for me to consider changing the title of this blog. Drunk and Stupid doesn’t seem to accurately capture my life as well as it once did. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still quite drunk and quite stupid. It’s just that, in light of my fantasy football ineptitude of the past weekend, I think adding the word (or words) “lazy, unbelievable fucking lazy” to that list of adjectives might be good idea. You see, I managed to lose in, not one but, both of my fantasy leagues this week because I forgot to set my roster. By not taking, oh I don’t know, five minutes out of my day on either Friday or Saturday (days upon which there were many opportunities for such a respite) I ended up sitting Larry Johnson (both leagues), Steve Smith, Maurice Jones-Drew, Antonio Gates (both leagues), Greg Jennings and Jerrious Norwood. As you might have guessed by now, I was completely destroyed in both leagues, losing by a combined 101 points.

- I was going mention the off-the-charts entertainment value of the Skins-Jags game in this space, but resident Al Saunders paramour Geoff just posted a much more comprehensive look at the game than I could have over at the Wheelhouse.

Seriously, what a game that turned out to be. After Brunell’s interception I was pretty sure that rabid Skins fans were going to burn down FedEx Field like a bunch of Brazilians burning toilets at a soccer game in an attempt to get Jason Campbell under center. However, Brunell recovered quickly, due in large part to Santana Moss and his game breaking creativity. As much as I wanted him to die on Sunday (He was torching my aforementioned fantasy teams. Yes, both of them), watching him run in the open field is one of the more enjoyable aspects of any NFL Sunday. Finally, the impact of Clinton Portis should never be overlooked as he clearly makes every single player in that offense more effective in their given roles. His ability to run with equal levels of effectiveness on the outside or within the tackles makes this Redskin offense as versatile as any the NFC has seen in recent vintage. Seriously, think about much more effective this unit could be with a steadier signal caller. Is there anybody who wouldn’t have the Skins as NFC Champs with Hasselbeck playing QB in place of Brunell? So much for not mentioning the Skins-Jags game.

- While the Skins-Jags game was undoubtedly the game of the week in the NFL. College football’s game of the week came from a much more unlikely source: Rutgers-USF. I watched most of this game on Friday night. First at the bar and then at my house. In fact, I was so into the second half of this game that I actually decided to stay home and watch it’s conclusion instead of going out. That doesn’t mean I didn’t get drunk. It’s just saying an awful lot when I eschew drinking with friends in order to stay home and watch two teams that I have absolutely no attachment to. Because I was drunk (and getting progressively more drunk) I won’t even bother with any analysis other than to say, that if you’re still sleeping on Rutgers it’s about time you stopped. They’ve got some legit NFL talent on that team and Schiano seems to have instilled the program with some genuine swagger. In my mind, he’s still a little lacking as far as x’s/o’s and in game adjustments go but he’s managed to completely change the culture within that program in a much shorter time than anybody could have ever guessed. When you’re trying to build a program at a traditionally downtrodden school with little to no athletic tradtition, changing the approach and culture of the players within the program (and the incoming recruits) is absolutely the most important early step.

- It’s been beaten to death already but I’m not one to show mercy, so here goes: You can’t have a much bigger condemnation of your starting QB than throwing a halfback pass on a potentially game tying two-point conversion late in the fourth quarter. And honestly, can you really blame Nick Saban? The Dolphins would be better off with Dante Calabria under center right now than the shell of QB that Daunte Culpepper has become. I didn’t think he was ever that impressive a QB before this season, but even I thought he’d at least be a minor upgrade (2-3 games) for a team that has started the likes of Frerotte, Feeley, Fiedler over the last few years. Obviously, I was wrong and clearly the only “best QB” title that still applies to Culpepper is “Best QB born in prison”. To be frank, even that’s up for debate now since I seem to remember hearing something about Marques Tuiasosoppo and a Japanese interment camp.

- I saw this on the internet yesterday and I had to share: Marquis Daniels has the most awesome tattoos I’ve ever seen. (Note: By “awesome”, I mean extremely disturbing and spectacularly ghetto). Please pay special attention his own personal version of the ever popular “Only the Strong Survive” tattoo. That, my friends, is a classic.

- I’m not going to get all preachy about Albert Haynesworth here. There’s plenty of people doing that for me already. I am going to point out that Albert “went to school” at the University of Tennessee. How did Fulmer miss out on Rae Carruth all those years ago? I bet that still sticks in his craw.

- I really like those Nike Commercials for “Briscoe High”. I’m not sure how much money they shelled out on those things, though I am sure it’s less than ESPN paid to promote ESPN Mobile (How’s that going for the Worldwide Leader anyway?). With that said, there are two items I’d like to discuss:

(1) Am I the only person who finds it odd that Briscoe would call a halfback pass on fourth and long late in the fourth quarter? Am I also the only person who wonders why the defense would bite on such a play? I mean, I haven’t seen as unrealistic a game winning play since Remember the Titans.

(2) Am I the only person who’s favorite part of the commercial is Deion Sanders’ white wife?

- Alright, I’ll say it. I miss listening to Paul Maguire spit all over himself whilst saying “Watch this, watch this right here!” every Sunday night on ESPN. It was like my own little version of a Sunday night lullaby in that it was so bad I just turned off the TV and went to bed instead of having to endure anymore of that “insight”. Now, I’m up until near midnight actually watching football on Sunday night. Come back to me Paul.

- Am I the only person who can’t figure out if Calvin Johnson is going to be as good as advertised as an NFL receiver? Maybe it’s all the lingering residue from guys like Charles Rogers, Mike Williams, David Terrell and, to a certain extent, Plaxico Burress but I’m having a lot of trouble buying into these big physical, but somewhat slow, receivers. There’s no denying that Johnson has terrific hands, and is great in the red zone. However, I’ve got serious doubts about his ability to consitently get open against NFL DBs. As we all know, everybody in the NFL is bigger and faster, especially DBs. So why is it always considered suck a lock that guys who make a living manhandling smallish college corners, like Johnson, are destined for NFL stardom? Other than T.O. (and he’s different too, in my opinion), name another elite receiver right now who is cut from the current big, physical receiver mold. I’m really interested to see what kind of 40 time Johnson posts come spring.

- Finally, yesterday brought us news that Christian Laettner and Brian Davis were going to buy the Memphis Grizzlies. If somebody would’ve told me that these two were buying a sports franchise I would’ve bet my house on it being the Golden State Warriors, or maybe the Calgary Flames.

Seriously though, who the hell even knew that these two had $40 million between them? What exactly has Brian Davis been doing since he left Duke. I mean, besides directing episodes of Will & Grace. Personally, I liked the report from yesterday’s press conference which mentioned how Davis openly bristled when the media laughed at his assertion that Laettner was going to play for the Grizzlies this year. Don’t make Brian Davis get Thomas “Quimby” Hill involved in this too.

One is the loneliest number.

Just in case you missedit, the Cardinals won yesterday. If I'm not mistaken, they play again today. Just letting you know.

K.I.M.

Just thought that i should mention that the Cardinals won last night. I'm actually not even sur why I am mentioning this. I mean, it's not like they're in the middle of a playoff race or anything.

So much pain...

I'm going to keep it short this morning and I don't care what you say about me (Greg). I severely jammed my the knuckle on my left index finger last night during my return to competitive basketball. Yep, that's right, in my first game back from a major calf muscle tear I managed to jam my knuckle bad enough that it's currently sitting somewhere in the middle of my hand. It's not anything that I haven't done a couple thousand times throughout my life but it still hurts like hell to type with my finger like this. If I was tough, I'd gut this one out for the team and soldier on with this post. However, as we all know, I'm not tough and I sure as hell don't care about "the team". It's all for the best any way because any post that I would've written today would've looked something like this:

Jesus the Cardinals suck. How the hell are we managing to continually find new and more pathetic ways to blow this once seemingly insurmountable lead? Oh, I forgot, because Albert Pujols can't play nine postitions at once. Maybe we can bring Joaquin Andujar, he was always good in the clutch and he can't be much worse than Jeff Suppan, can he?

I was going to ignore this subject in hopes of St. Louis turning this thing around on their own but now I've got to mention it in (futile) hopes of stemming the tide for the Redbirds. Sadly, I'm thinking its a case of too little, (far) too late. By the way, have I ever mentioned before how much I hate the Astros? I have? Oh, because I really hate the fucking Astros.

Okay. I've got to stop before I end up opening that package that Terrence Kiel sent me. That's for a special occasion (read: The birth of my third illegitimate child, Da'Quan)

Or maybe it would look a little more like this:

Wow. Alabama, huh? I really hate those goddamned inbreds. Sure not as much as the hillbillies in Knoxville but it's a strong hate. It stings the nostrils. Last year's 31-3 ass raping was one of the more embarrassing Gator games I've ever experienced. I would say it was the worst since the 1999 SEC Championship game. Who was that game against again? Oh yeah, Al-a-BAMA!!! I'm really hoping for a Spurrier-esque revenge game here. Those were always nice. Of course, the last time the Tide walked into the Swamp they walked out with a victory and Shaun Alexander was approximately $5 million richer (Does he send Keith Kelsey a Christmas card every year? Because he should). I'm just going to stop thinking about this game tomorrow before all the anxiety of it combined with the thought of the Cardinals' inevitable collapse makes me throw up...too late. Wow, I don't even remember eating corn last night.

Alright, that's it. My finger's throbbing and I've already thrown up once. That doesn't usually happen until at least 8 pm on a Friday. I'm gonna go lay down.















Florida will be wearing throwback uniforms tomorrow against the Tide. I'm hoping this is just a promotional photo.