I'm talking about you!! Paul.

There were some candidates for great games last night but, other than WVU-Creighton, they all fizzled out pretty spectacularly. Creighton should feel horrible this morning. They absolutely blew that game last night.

-As I was watching the Winthrop-Gonzaga game, I was imagining the Winthrop huddle and I kept thinking that at some point the phrase, "These white boys ain't shit!" was being uttered by one of the upperclassmen leaders.

- Even with the horrible implications that a Gonzaga loss would've had for my bracket, I would have really loved to have seen them go out to Winthrop, if only because its always good to see the "experts" be totally exposed for the clueless jamokes that we all are when it comes to the tournament.

-Winthrop was/is a very talented passing team.

-Chris Paul has alot of Isiah Thomas in him. I don't mean that in reference to his game either. Isiah was more a scoring point guard while Paul is a little more of the traditional pass first point guard. They are both capable of being the lead guy or the setup guy on a team, they just have different natural tendencies. What I mean is that both Isiah (early in his career) and Paul are guys who the media seems to love and always talk glowingly about. Yet, if you watch Paul you'll see that he does alot of little shit that would lead you to believe he's a bit of a punk. We all know about him roshamboing Julius Hodge and he also got into a scuffle with Daniel Ewing earlier this year, but those things happen from time to time in basketball and can be excused as lapses in judgement. What bothered me last night is that he was doing alot of jawing with the guys on Chattanooga and following that up with stupid little things like grabbing the ball out of the hoop after every basket. It seems like nothing to most fans but it really struck me as unneccessary for a player of his caliber. He completely reminded me of the guy in pickup ball who makes it no fun for everybody else to play because he's turning it into a personal battle between him and the entire oppossing team. Of course, this wasn't a pickup game and I'm sure his own teammates didn't mind one bit. I'm not totally sure what my overall point is but I know that I think Chris Paul is an undercover punk who hides behind his nice schoolboy image, just like Isiah used to, I guess I could've said that alot more quickly.

That's it, I need to feed this mini-hangover before it expands and ruins my entire morning. I'll be back later.

Rain is so AWESOME!!

I feel like the guy on that Tiny House commercial...this is pretty awesome!

Today is working out swimmingly already. I woke up about 15 minutes later than normal so I rushed around the house in order to get to work on time...didn't happen, of course. That normally would be a horrible way to start the day except, in this case, nobody noticed so I slid into work and filled out yet another bracket (#5) while checking my email. By the time I finished this up, the game which was scheduled for today (and bound to disturb my tourney viewing) had been cancelled due to the epic rainstorm that has engulfed Florida for the past 15 hours or so. Anyway, with no gameday responsibilites for me to handle, I can now concentrate on two key things: (1) Setting a good base for all the drinking I plan on doing this evening (early Vegas line for the over/under on # of car bombs: 3...psst, take the over) and of course (2) watching basketball. With all the free time that I have today, I may even grab a long lunch while watching some early afternoon tournament games as well. Anyway, here are a few of the upsets that I picked in what I'm calling my #1 bracket, followed by a couple of upsets I wanted to pick but couldn't pull the trigger on:

Upsets:

Wisconsin-Milwaukee over Bama: I just don't think Alabama is playing very good basketball right now, they seem like they peaked in mid-January. UWM screwed me two years ago against Notre Dame so we'll see if they can make it up to me here. I have taken UWM in the second round as well...you can all feel free to point and laugh.

Creighton over WVU: Not much of an upset here. The MVC is a very good conference (not three teams in the NCAA tourney good mind you) and I think WVU blew their wad in the Big East Tournament.

New Mexico over Nova: I talked about this earlier in the week. I'm going with the "John Wallace Best Versatile Big Upperclassmen" theorem here, which clearly applies to Danny Granger who should be far too much for anyone on Villanova to handle. By the way, Dick Vitale wants me to tell you that Villanova Coach Jay Wright is a "very good looking man". Uhhh, thanks Dick...I guess.

Near picks:

Vermont vs. Syracuse: I really wanted to pick this one but couldn't quite get over the sting of picking Manhattan to upset the 'Cuse two years ago in the first round. That ended up killing my bracket since, you know Syracuse won the whole damn thing and all of that. With that said, I do think that Vermont is Taylor-made (get it, Taylor, like Taylor Coppenrath...I'm so witty) to beat the Syracuse zone with the shooters they have, especially if Tomm Brennan sticks Coppenrath in the high post on offense.

Oklahoma vs. Niagara: I talked about Niagara last week and how I was thinking of taking them, all the while spelling Niagara incorrectly. That's a public school education for ya. This is just a bad matchup for the Purple Eagles though. Juan Mendez is a hell of a player but I see him having some serious trouble matching up with both Bookout and Gray inside. Simply put, Niagara doesn't have enough size inside to take Oklahoma deep into the second half.

ODU vs. Michigan State: I think Michigan State is very overrated and I also think that ODU is good enough to beat a bunch of teams in this tourney. Here's the problem: ODU's best player is PF Alex Loughton who will be matching up with Paul Davis and the assorted thugs that Tom "I married my mexican maid" Izzo brings off his bench. Doesn't look good for the Monarchs inside. Seriously, you could matchup MSU with just about any other 12 and I pick them to lose and I really , really like ODU, but its all about the matchups and I don't like them in this one. Sorry.

One more thing: I finally broke down and picked one of my brackets using a completely ridiculous method which should guarantee me a first place finish if history is any indicator. So how did I pick this bracket you ask? Simple, the Mascot Death Match Method. It all comes down to who would win if the two mascots had to battle to the death. For example, a Bucknell Bison would stomp a Kansas Jayhawk...so Bucknell advances. I've always wondered what it would be like to be my Mom...and now I know. If I do well with this method (based on my example, thats not very likely) I may never use my brain to pick a bracket again.

Tommorrow I'll discuss some of the second round upsets that I have picked because, well, I will be really hung over and stuck at work so I might as well bore you all to death with my idiotic ramblings.

All Digger, all the time.

Digger Phelps wasn't matching his tie with his highlighter last night, which was nice. He was, however, busy comparing Channing Frye and Salim Stoudamire to Emeka Okafor and Ben Gordon. How can someone who is paid to analyze basketball make such an innane blanket statement? He works for ESPN, that's how. It seems like Digger just looked for the best inside-outside combo of upperclassmen and tagged them this year's version of Okafor and Gordon, because the while the games of these two groups may resemble each other on the surface, there is no comparison when it comes to the overall ability and consistency.

I'll start with Gordon and Stoudamire: Yes they're both somewhat undersized shooting guards. Here's the difference, Gordon possessed the ability to run the point for long stretches at UConn while also being lethal at creating his own shot off the dribble. So much so that many had Gordon pegged as a combo guard in the Gilbert Arenas mold when he entered the draft last summer. Stoudamire, on the other hand, is a shooter first and foremost. He can do a little creating off the dribble but his game is primarily of the catch and shoot variety. Lute Olson would sooner run off and get married six months after his wife died of cancer than ever let Stoudamire run the point for Arizona. Wait, that's a bad analogy...well, you get the point. Simply put, Gordon and Stoudamire have very different games with one major similarity: they can both shoot very well. Yeah, them and 75 other 6'3" guards in the country.

Frye vs. Okafor: If I was Emeka Okafor, I would find Digger Phelps and impale him with antlers like Slippery Dan on Deadwood this past Sunday. Its insulting to everything that Okafor accomplished in college to put him on the same level of a chronic underachiever like Frye. Okafor was the consensus National Player of the Year while Frye couldn't even make First Team All-PAC 10 this year. The PAC-10, by the way, wasn't exactly making Pete Newell drool over thoughts of the potential its young big men possessed this past year. Okafor was the most dominant player in all of college basketball last year, hands down. Frye could never be described using the word dominant other than, maybe, a phrase such as, "Channing Frye was was the dominant disappointment in the underachieving recruiting class of 2000 at the University of Arizona." It is an insult to the intelligence of college basketball fans as well as to Emeka Okafor to ever compare Channing Frye and Okafor. Hell, its and insult to compare Frye to Loren Woods. Other than both being black and over 6'9", there are no viable comparisons between Emeka Okafor and Channing Frye.

I truly believe that the only reason more people don't hate Digger Phelps is that his sublime stupidity is outshone by the endless (and pointless) rantings of Dick Vitale which have overshadowed him for so many years, thereby safeguarding him from the public scrutiny that his awful analysis truly deserves. I can't believe people like him get paid to misinform thousands of unsuspecting people for 8 months a year. Actually he works for ESPN so I can believe that...I guess I should be surprised that he doesn't have his own channel yet.

I stand corrected. That was a dumb question.

I never get tired of that Miller Lite commercial. I wish I could say the same thing about Miller Lite.

-I can't tell you how excited I am that I won't have to hear about the "bubble" for the next 350 days. Actually, I can but it isn't really all that interesting so I'll just save all of us the trouble.

-I hate Notre Dame with a totally irrational fervor but I, too, agree that they got screwed pretty good by the selection committee. 9-7 in the Big East against that schedule is pretty damn good.

-The Pit looks like an Auto Parts store from the outside, seriously. I know its all underground but damn, spice the entrance up a little bit. You are hosting a regional final there fellas.

-Louisville deserved better than a #4 seed, much better. I thought they had a real shot at a #2 and maybe even a #1 seed, how they only garnered a #4 is beyond me. Am I the only person who wished they could have heard Francisco Garcia yell out "Dios Mio!!" when the bracket was unveiled? I didn't think so.

-I would love to talk about the Florida Gators but my own rules for this blog prevent that in any manner. This is what I will say: Congrats on the SEC title, you guys deserved it. What you didn't deserve however was to get stuck in the same bracket as UNC, UCONN, Kansas, and Villanova. Is that suppossed to be some kind of reward for winnng the SEC tourney while beating Mississippi State, Alabama and Kentucky (twice) in an eight day span? Gee, thanks committee guys...maybe you'd like to kick Billy Donovan's dog while you're at it.

- I haven't watched a ton of Washington games but I refuse to believe them as a #1 seed, its obviously my blantant East Coast bias. The only reason they even were considered for that spot in the first palce is that the PAC-10 was the #2 rated conference in the RPI which I don't understand in the least but still feel comfortable calling a total sham. I have no journalistic integrity and it feels quite good.

-Cincy-UK in the second round has the potential to be the ugliest game in recorded human history. If the over under on that game is anywhere in the 90s...I'm putting my kidneys up for the collateral on my bet. Then again, Sean Elliot's brother is my bookie so we operate on a slightly different system than your standard betting service.

-I really, really like New Mexico to beat Villanova. Danny Granger should be too much for anybody on that Wildcat frontline to handle.

- What's the over/under for the number of technical fouls in that Charlotte vs. NC State game? 6? 7? Ok, it might not be that chippy but you've got to believe Charlotte comes into that game with a huge chip on their shoulder...you know since ACC coaches would rather eat glass
than play a home and home against the 49ers.

-I refuse to believe that the Missouri Valley Conference deserved three teams in this tournament. If you ask me (and you didn't) that is nothing more than blatant pandering to the mid-major masses by the committee. I know its a good conference with very underrated players but in no way should a ten loss team that lost in the conference tourney quarterfinals of the MVC be receiving a bid.

-I guess I'm just not that smart but I don't understand how Illinois is the #1 overall seed in the eintire tournament but they're not playing against the winner of the play-in game. Can anybody explain this to me? If you can, please feel free to insult my intelligence (or lack thereof) all throughout your explanation as I clearly deserve to be aired out for my lack of bracket acumen.

-The tournament starting and St. Patrick's Day falling on the same day has legitimate potential to be the end of my current career. How do you explain getting fired because you left work for lunch and returned four hours later with a healthy buzz and a "Fuck me! I'm Irish" Button when you're going through the process of finding a new job? Whose to say that I would even seek a new job. Being unemployed is extremely underrated...believe me.

Can I punch you in the head!

I'm at work on a saturday morning so I'm clearly looking for ways to waste time when I mosey on over to espn.com and notice a new mail bag from Bill Simmons. I love his mailbags, probably my favorite aspect of his column, other than his ramblings. I am reading along and enjoying myself quite a bit when Simmons starts discussing Nirvana. Now, I'm sure you can read so I won't bore you with the details but he calls Nirvana's performance on MTV Unplugged "mediocre" and follows that gem up with this comment "It actually mad me sad the first time I watched it." WOW!!! Umm, I guess there's a reason why he's not called "The Music Guy". What a fucking idiot. Is he aware that they covered a ton of those obscure songs specifically for the performance or that they did it all in one take (everybody else on this show always did multiple takes to get their songs to come off just right), or is he really that fucking stupid? I will never, ever feel the same about Bill Simmons. Stick to the Celtics and the Sox you fucking dumbass.

I bet Dick Gephardt doesn't talk to people that way!

Today we had yet another Spring Training game in our facility. By this point in Spring Training, its all become pretty much the same routine on a gameday with the only difference being the crowd size on a particular day which has a direct correlation with two things: (1) weather and (2) opposing team. Well today's weather was beautiful and the St. Louis Cardinals were in town, which meant that we would have a an above average (size wise) crowd in attendance today. There was however one thing that was a little different than normal, there were a few minor celebrities in attendance. We get celebrities from time to time but normally, somebody's agent or secretary will call and inform a member of our staff that so-and-so is planning on attending today's game and ask if we could arrange for a luxury suite or special parking privleges.

Today was different, there were two minor celebrities in attendance and neither had anybody call ahead to inform us. One was former politician Dick Gephardt who just sauntered in and sat down in a box seat, enjoyed a beer or two and then left without ever being bothered or noticed. The second celebrity was John Goodman. John was not nearly as lucky as Mr. Gephardt because, as we all know, a whole lot more people have seen King Ralph than the number of people who could even name there own representatives and senators, much less one from Missouri. Well, needless to say, Goodman was quickly noticed and after fighting off autograph hounds and well wishers for the better part of seven innings decided it best if he vacated the premises shortly after the seventh inning stretch. Our staff generally hands out pocket schedules to people exiting the stadium during the final two innings and happened to already be manning the gates in the bottom half of the seventh. As Mr. Goodman was on his way out, he strode through the exit and past my colleague Calvin who says to John, "Hey Walter, tell the Dude I said hi." Without missing a beat a clearly annoyed John Goodman blurts out, "Blow me!". Well, Calvin and fellow staff member Joe both hear this and erupt into laughter as John Goodman walks away feeling just a little bit better about himself. What an awesome dude.

WOW, there are advantages to this job.

I'm actually thinking taking in some Major League Baseball this afternoon. The reasoning behind this departure from my normal routine is that the Marlins are in town to take on the Nationals today. I know that alone doesn't exactly scream "must see" but today's pitching matchup is a good one, with Dontrelle Willis starting against Livan Hernandez, thereby producing the odd combination of personal interest in a spring training game (very rare for me) and the ability to get out of the ticket office and sit down to watch a few minutes of early inning baseball (even more rare). When you work at a spring training site the games themselves lose alot of luster. Especially when, by the time you get to actually watch baseball, the field is full of guys wearing numbers like 78 and 67 who will no doubt be playing for the Savannah Sand Gnats by May.

I bet he never banged Roger Dorn's wife though.

Evidently, Anderson Varejao has been nicknamed "Wild Thing" by the good people in the Cleveland Cavaliers marketing department. They even go so far as to play the song whenever young Mr. Varejao does something of note, like last night when he committed a loose ball foul by taking out Steve Francis' legs while diving for a loose ball. Jeez...What an abomination. Rick Vaughn must be rolling over in his grave...or at least the duplex that he shares with Willie Hayes.

Some guy pops out of your bathroom like a goddamned magic show!!

On Monday evening there was quite a lengthy discussion over at Jerry's Wheelhouse ( available @ www.wheelhouse.blogspot.com ) on the topic of female related feuds between athletes.

Needless to say, it was a very interesting read. Jerry's Wheelhouse is a well-written blog whose comments section serves as a message board of sorts for a group of friends, which includes both of the blog's contributors. Anyway, the discussion on the message board included stories about such well known feuds as the Jason Kidd-Jamal Mashburn-Toni Braxton love triangle of years gone by and a number of other feuds, some more well known than others. I suggest going by the page listed above and reading some of the discussion. The point of me telling you all of this is simple: As I was watching the Magic mail in yet another road game versus the Cavs, my thoughts turned to Jeff McInnis and the journeyman start to his NBA career which invariably led to me remembering a female related feud that included Jeff McInnis and then to another feud invloving Jeff and somebody else's lady friend. Don't ask me why I find this sort of thing completley enthralling. That's like asking a bird why it flys. They don't know why, they just do. Well the same goes for me and my love for smutty stories involving athletes. So without further ado, I present you the (admittedly sketchy) stories of Jeff McInnis and his one-eyed tarheel.

Circa 1999-2000: Jeff is playing for the Los Angeles Clippers and the Toronto Raptors are in town finishing up a west coast swing. On the morning of the game between LA and Toronto, the Clippers are finishing up their morning shootaround as the Raptors arrive to begin theirs. Soon after arriving in the gym, the Raptors are preparing to take the floor. As the Clippers are walking off the court, Charles Oakley walks right up to Jeff McInnis and doesn't say a word but instead punches McInnis square in the face, knocking McInnis to the ground. In typical Oakley fashion, Charles never says a thing to Jeff and continues on his way to the other end of the court. McInnis eventually gets up uninjured, though slightly dazed. It later comes out that Jeff and Charles were, uh, sharing the same plate of seafood if you know what I mean. Source: More than rumor as it was reported by numerous NBA beat writes who were present for this exchange.

1996: During his junior year at the University of North Carolina, McInnis was the third member of an elite triumvarate, that included Rasheed Wallace and Jerry Stackhouse, that all would end up declaring for the NBA draft after their junior seasons. While Wallace and Stackhouse were sure-fire lottery picks, it was widely assumed that McInnis declared due to a combination of academic ineptitude and reticence to play with a new cast of characters. While I'm quite sure that McInnis wasn't in danger of making the honor roll at anytime, there was a much larger reason for Jeff's early departure from Chapel Hill. Evidently, McInnis wanted to stick around for his senior year in order to boost his NBA stock into the first round area but was informed soon after the season by none other than Dean Smith himself that he would no longer be welcome in the Carolina program. The reason for this is that Jeff had allegedly been caught "practicing the four corners" with the wife of UNC's All-Time leading scorer and assistant coach Phil Ford...by Phil himself. Apparently this led to a minor scuffle between the two men and ultimately resulted in Jeff being asked to leave the Carolina family. Source: I lived in North Carolina during this time and this story was fairly well known among people with ties to the the university of North Carolina.

I hope Carlos Arroyo was watching!

I really enjoyed watching the some of the conference tournaments finals last night as these games are akin to what the regional final games are for the high-major programs. By that I mean that these aren't the final destination for these teams, but they are (at most) two games away from the final destination. Unless you're in a league like the Missouri Valley Conference or the Mid-American Conference, then you really don't have much chance of surviving past the round of sixteen, at all. As a result of this, the intensity and passion on the floor is very similar to what you will see in late March.

Two of these games intrigued me throughout the night. The VCU-ODU matchup promised to be a good one, these were clearly the two best teams in the Colonial Athletic Conference and I had watched their earlier matchup during one of the ESPN Bracket Buster Saturdays. This game featured former Dukie Jeff Capel coaching against his father's former school (one of many for the elder Jeff Capel) ,Old Dominion, while trying to take VCU to the big dance for the second straight year. I liked ODU in this one, based on the star power of both PG Isiah Hunter and PF Alex Loughton. The game ended up being as anti-climactic as any overtime game that I've ever seen based soley on the fact that VCU did absolutely nothing during the extra period. It was almost like they realized they blew their shot when they had ODU on the ropes with about two minutes left and were totally spent when ODU forced OT, causing VCU to come out totally flat for the biggest five minutes of their season, which is inexcusable. Even with that, it was still a fun and exciting game to watch, until the last five minutes at least. ODU could definitely do some damage in the tourney, maybe even sneaking into the sweet sixteen if the matchups fall just right. By the way, I say that Capel is coaching in the ACC within three years...but I also predicted that he would be playing in the NBA after watching him during his freshman year at Duke, so I am clearly either (a) in love with Jeff Capel or (b) not fit to pontificate on matter's involving former Duke point guards. Sadly, its probably a little of both.

Niagra-Rider didn't end up being a very good game and normally I wouldn't care in the least about a MAAC Championship game but this game a little different for me. Both Niagra star Juan Mendez and point guard Alvin Cruz played their high school ball in my hometown at a prep school by the name of Florida Air Academy. Since FAA is a prep school they recruit players and one of their most fertile recruiting grounds is none other than the island of Puerto Rico. While the rest of the world was just figuring out that Puerto Ricans even knew what basketball was this summer in Athens, the folks at Florida Air Academy have been scouring the P.R. for hoops talent like George Michael looks for public bathrooms for the better part of a decade now.

Alvin Cruz led FAA to an undefeated state championship season his senior year and then followed his close friend and fellow puerto rican Juan Mendez to upstate New York. Cruz was a much more heralded player in high school than Mendez, even garnering an All-State selection in his classification while also being name the MVP of the state final four, but it is Mendez who is the star of this Niagra team. Mendez was named MAAC Player of the Year while averaging 23.4 pts and 10.4 rbs a game and is said to have an outside shot at the NBA if he performs well in the pre-draft camps in Portsmouth and Phoenix. Regardless of if this happens or not, Mendez is a VERY good post player who is going to give some team fits in the first round of the NCAAs. I still haven't decided if I'm going to pick Niagra in the first round but I'm certainly leaning in that direction. Oh yeah, FAA is a team that you'll most likely be hearing more of in the years to come. They are currently undefeated and seeking their third state title in four years and led by a point guard named Walter Hodge (also puerto rican) who has narrowed his college choices to Florida, Auburn, and Kansas. Kansas is the front runner in my opinion because former FAA center Sasha Kaun is currently a freshman on Bill Self's squad.

At least she doesn't have the, uh, sea cucumber condition...

Now that the Lavernues Coles trade is pretty much a done deal, maybe ABC will bring back former sideline personality Lisa Guerrero so she can ask Chad Pennington what is was like to talk to his former receiver before they faced each other on the field. She definitely screwed the pooch (career wise as she didn't, to my knowledge, actually eff a canine) when she asked Patrick Ramsey that question in reference to Coles (who was actually his new receiver) two years ago. Yet, if she was brought back into the fold for next year she could ask that question to Pennington and regardless of if she dropped Coles's name or that of Santana Moss, she would technically be right and thus could finally save some face actually being a worse sideline reporter than Eric Dickerson.

So tired...Must. Get. Rest.

I'm completely wiped today and have no time to sit down and put together any type of coherent thoughts, so I'm neglecting my responsibilities here first...you know since my job actually pays me to not neglect those responsibilities. I will say that Sean May put together an amazing performance yesterday. I knew it was pretty damn impressive when I was watching but 26 pts and 24 rebounds? Jesus that's sick. If I was allowing myself to comment on Gator Basketball, I would talk about yesterday's upset win at Kentucky but I think we all know I placed a moratorium on that banter a few months back. Lets just say that I was very happy around 4 PM yesterday afternoon and it had absolutely nothing to do with Christian Guzman legging out a triple in the fourth inning.

I gotta go get some sleep, even a beer doesn't sound good right now...what in god's name has become of me?

My bad...

Sorry about the double post of the stuff from yesterday...I'm a huge idiot with much less than an acceptable amount of computer technology skills for a child who was raised in the 80's. I'm working on it though because, as we all know, "Girls only wanna date guys who have great skills."

Nice bow tie...asshole.

DC Mayor Anthony Williams is in our facility today to check out a game. When a member of our staff asked him if he'd be interested in throwing out the first pitch, his reply was as follows, "I don't want to cheapen myself by throwing out a first pitch before the exhibition game in DC." Ummm, I think the fact that you're only being allowed to throw out the first pitch at an exhibition game cheapens you plenty, thanks.

Here's my bold prediciton for the day: With Florida hosting Kentucky and Duke taking on UNC this afternoon, Anthony Williams will watch at least three more innings of baseball than I do today. I'm in no way saddened by this turn of events.

One last thing: I was walking into a bar last night and noticed it had two empty handicapped, parking spots which got me thinking. If somebody is well enough to drive themselves out for a drink or three, shouldn't they have to park where everybody else does? I'm all for preferred parking for these people at the grocery store and other neccesity type places but at a bar? Really? C'mon...if you want to get drunk with the rest of us then you're gonna have to drag that bum leg a few extra yards to do it.

Nice bow tie...asshole.

DC Mayor Anthony Williams is in our facility today to check out a game. When a member of our staff asked him if he'd be interested in throwing out a first pitch, his reply was as follows, " I don't want to cheapen myself by throwing out a first pitch before the exhibition game in DC." Ummm, I think the fact that you're only being allowed to throw out a first pitch at the exhibition game and not the actual first game cheapens you plenty, thanks.

Here's my bold predicition for today: With Florida hosting Kentucky and Duke taking on UNC this afternoon, Anthony Williams will see at least 3 more innings of baseball than I do. Not to worry, I can still get my baseball fix if I plan accordingly...you know, since their are 84 more games being played in this facility between now and September.

Can a white guy be Mr. CIAA? Please!?

I had my first day off since Super Bowl Sunday yesterday and "it was glorious"...actually it was below average, at best, as I ended moving from 9am until five or six in the evening. Sadly, I'm not even completely moved in and will have plenty of situating to do this evening when I get home. One thing that definitely brightened up my day was tuning in to the second half of the CIAA conference tournament final. Initially it seemed like one of the worst turns of fate possible as I was blessed with the commentating stylings of none other than Stephen A. Smith. I wasn't aware that he even did anything other than yell at Marc Stein and Greg Anthony during NBA Shootaround but boy was I wrong...Stephen A. can yell at viewers while ignoring the action on the court as well.

Within five minutes my eardrums were bleeding and even my dog Tinsley was reaching for the bottle of Xanax...but then the most awesome dude I've ever seen appeared on my TV screen. His name is Abraham Mitchell and he goes by the moniker "Mr. CIAA". Apparently, Abraham is a resident of Suffolk, VA and attends each and every CIAA tourney because...well, its the goddamned CIAA conferencew tourney, that's why! This guy changes clothes every half hour and only wears suits that match the colors of CIAA teams. This is what I read on the internet about him at least. I'm of the opinion that this information may be somewhat erroneous as I'm not sure which CIAA team has pink in its colors. That's right, the man was wearing a pink suit named "bubblicious" and was not just pink but "champale", which I did not know was a color. As you can probably tell these aren't your standard suits but more along the lines of the suits that Mr. Whitefolks wears. How this guy became known as Mr. CIAA is beyond me but I think that the SEC should adopt this promotional tool. I'm quite sure we could find plenty of pimps willing to take a weekend out of their year in order to attend the SEC tourney between the states of Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi and the rest. I wish I was making at least some of this up but sadly I'm 100% serious about all of this, even about the SEC.

Uhh, Friday.

Yeah, that pretty much sums up how Fridays make me feel these days. You know that feeling when you wake up on a Friday and you know that all you have to do is sleepwalk through one more day until you can be free for awhile? Yeah, well I don't...not during this time of year. Fridays actually enrage me at this point of the year. Its not just that I have to work tommorrow and Sunday, its more that every person (outside of work) who I deal with today will end our interactions with "have a nice weekend" or "enjoy your weekend" or something else along those lines. Its a constant reminder that everybody else is going to be getting drunk (without it hanging on their conscience) and sleeping in for the next two days, while I'll be getting up at 8 AM so that I can drag my tired ass into work by 8:30. Its enough to make somebody like me, whose already a little off-kilter to begin with, lose their mind in the most public of forums. For example, last Friday, my friend Calvin and I were running some errands for work right around 5 PM and we were stuck in some pretty hellacious rush-hour traffic. While were sitting at the light we're watching all kinds of people perform everyday tasks such as getting gas, merging into traffic and even buying beer, except they were all doing it with the same ridiculous look on their face. Kind of like the look that a special olympic athlete gets right before they cross the finish line in first place. Its an expression of pure joy, yet it comes out looking like this person is peeing in their wetsuit. Well this was more than Calvin and myself could take. We both started yelling at people for the most minute of driving mistakes as well as any number of other perceived slights against the two of us. All within five minutes of each other, I had yelled at some Puerto Rican lady for not moving after a green light fast enough while Calvin screamed at some Nascar dude for driving like a woman. He then broke into song when he saw a beer truck pull up at the 7-11. The song went something like "Hey! Beer dude bring me some free beer, bitch". This was all followed by me falling asleep in the front seat of Calvin's car while he was driving 85 miles an hour on the highway...at 5:30. Pathetic, I know. Anyway, thats where I was last Friday and we opened Spring Training this week so I haven't exaclty caught up on my rest in the days since last Friday. Oh yeah, there is one more thing...I have to move into a new house tommorrow.

Harold Arceneaux...we hardly knew ye.

I was watching the Pacers-Nuggets game last night and while watching Eddie Gill do his best impression of and NBA point guard, I remembered that Eddie had been a part of that Weber State team that stormed through heavily favored North Carolina en route to becoming that year's NCAA tourney cinderella du-jour in 1999. I know that du-jour is in reference the insert noun "of the day" but I have know idea what the french way to say "of the year" is so we're just sticking with du-jour. Anyway, Eddie Gill was the second banana on that team to Harold Arceneaux, who most assurredly would've been a first round pick (and bust) if he had gone pro after that, his junior year. Unfortunately for Harold, he decided to stay and raise his stock while pursuing a degree. Of course, Weber State was unable to recapture that tourney magic the next year and Harold slid off into basketball oblivion. I hadn't thought about Harold in years...until last night that is. So I decided to check up on Harold. After bouncing around Europe for a few years and doing some "community work" in his native New Orleans (read: sleeping in Grama's extra bedroom), Harold is currently playing for the Utah Snow Bears of the ABA. Good to know that Harold is safe and sound...hopefully Eddie is giving him some percentage of his checks to Eddie these days, or at least inviting Harold to hang out with Eddie's posse during All-Star weekend and things like that. In case you want to check on Harold, here you go...http://www.usbasket.com/USAplayer.asp?PlayerID=13645.

You'd be surprised what two martinis does to Lesley Visser

While watching the Wake Forest-Georgia Tech game last night I had a few random thoughts, so here they are:

-Chris Paul is a heck of an all-around player. His left hand looks better than last year and he seems to shoot with alot more confidence than early in the year. He struggled in the first half but then came back in the second half and completely took over the game, mostly with his passing. Paul may struggle a little in the NBA at first but his unparalled (in college) passing ability will more than make up for his initial defensive definciencies. He sees cutters and delivers the ball as good or better than TJ Ford used to and he is far ahead of where Ford was offensively as a sophomore.

-I always thought that Jamal Levy was from Panama City, FL not the capital of the country of Panama. Something about the name Jamal Levy didn't scream Central America to me.

-I only ever noticed Wake reserve forward Chris Ellis for his enormous dome and horrible cornrows and then last night Mike Patrick revealed that he is the son of former NBA sharpshooter Dale Ellis. Interesting, once I heard this I immediately thought of how painful it must be for Dale to have a son that is so offensively deficient...seriously, have you ever seen how ugly Chris Ellis' shot is?

-Does Wake Forest really have to play that horrible "Zombie Nation" song during every timeout? Did they lose their Macarena CD?

-Will Bynum is the embodiement of the word gunner. Damn that kid likes to shoot. If Bynum possessed any level of ability to get his teammates involved, then he would probably make himself a very nice living in the NBA. He is an unbelievable athlete and possesses great strength but even Troy Hudson can't believe some of the shots that this guy takes. Can you imagine him and Salim Stoudamire trying to share the ball if Bynum had stayed at Arizona? I would pay money to watch Lute Olson try and break up that fight, good money.

-Is the Wake Forest reserve named Visser the product of some torrid night in late march between Billy Packer and Lesley Visser? Can I at least pretend he is?

Oh yeah, I almost forgot...Sam Ryan from ESPN is much more attractive in person than you would think when watching her on TV. God I hope my girlfriend's internet is down today.

I wish Endy Chavez would stop looking at me like that...

Spring training has officially begun, which means...only 30 more days until I get a day off. Mmmmm, I can almost taste it...well not really.

I think that Dick Vitale has a stipulation is his contract that states he must mention Andrew Bogut at least once per telecast, either that or he's never actually seen Bigut play and figures if he constantly talks about hm then we'll all think that Dick is supremely informed on all things college basketball...yeah thats probably much more likely.

I need a beer or eight.